Selections From The BlogLand Dictionary 4
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Posted:Aug 28, 2006 8:56 pm
Last Updated:Jun 4, 2023 9:02 pm
13924 Views
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lollypop head law-lee-pawp hed
n. 1. The moment when a cartoon character realizes that they have been had, and their head turns into a SUCKER.
2. A chump. A patsy. A sap. EXAMPLE When abandoned without warning by his internet "soulmate", the poor, poor pitiful lollypopper was ashamed to find he had been played for another's sexual and emotional gratification.
No wait. He suddenly realized that he had been so suffocatingly "in love" that he scared the girl into faking her own death to be rid of him.
Hmm, that must be "reverse lollypopping". 
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Classic Comments #6
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Posted:Aug 22, 2006 11:39 pm
Last Updated:Oct 24, 2015 9:14 pm
18910 Views
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The Venting Blog Presents: Classic Comments
Yes folks, that's right. I've been reduced to posting comments that I've made in your blogs. Todays choice comes from [blog amberabercrombie] , by amberabercrombie. The sixth entry into this series is exerpted from her post [post 287627], from March 27, 2006. She wanted some help finishing a story...
amberabercrombie 3/27/2006 7:32 pm
Your challenge:
-------------------------------------------------
I'll start:
Many thought she was crazy being taken by him, some would say she had lost all touch with reality..that night she laid there upon her white silk sheets and began to reminisce about the conversations they had had, her body ached with unforgiven pleasure, grinding and sliding between her sheets, she closed her eyes and pictured a place were only her dreams could take her, she thought of of him, conjuring up the perfect mental image in her mind...
she slipped off her red silk lacy thongs, only to feel the warmth of herself among her sheets, it didn't take much for her hands to find their way down to her wetness and explore, slipping in and out of her wet, hot, throbbing clit....
while groaning in her midnight pleasures she heard a loud tapping at her door, who could it be?...Uh Oh ....did I hear something...what's that? I do believe it's the sound of my stove going off.. dinner's ready!...
That's about where I'm cutting you off.. YOUR challenge, if your so inclined to be brave and amuse me, funny, sexual or otherwise, or fuck to just say hi.. is to finish this one ...make it good I have a hot date with my toys tonight ...Third times a charm...re-posting, this thing self deleted twice now lol...
BRING IT ON
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3/29/2006 1:58 pm
With the sound of the oven timer buzzing in my ears I ran to the door and opened it. There to my horror I found a small fire on my front porch. Instinctively I stomped on the burning paper bag and put out the flames.
Grrr! #$%$^&$ !
Hopping on my good foot with my, smelly, smoking shoe held high I ran back to the oven flipping the switch to the timer. It began to buzz even louder, and I mashed it repeadedly to try and make it stop.
It was at that moment that the phone on the wall rang. With the oven timer wailing unceasingly I hopped to the phone but I lost my balance when I reached for the reciever. As my smoking stinkfoot came down it landed squarely in the trash can and burst into flames!
I jumped back, as the flames shot up the wall exploding the phone. The sauce on the top burner overflowed as I turned and fled out the door. Of course my good foot planted itself in the smoking pile of shit on my porch and slid out from under me as I tumbled off the porch and into the yard.
I looked up as the flames began flickering in the upper windows of my home. Flies were buzzing around my smoking feet.
The oven timer droned on...
The End.
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For more Classic Comments see:
1 This one is a real hoot folks Check it out
2 love poetry between kcc and mzhuny
3 a song for the BlogLand Retirement Home
4 bad puns
5 even worse puns
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24
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Selections From The BlogLand Dictionary 3
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Posted:Aug 19, 2006 10:35 pm
Last Updated:Jun 4, 2023 8:56 pm
14968 Views
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handle-ization hand-el-eye-zay-shun
n. A blogging strategy that employs the use of member handles to lure specific bloggers to a post. EXAMPLE keithcancook wanted to thank happyladychat, bustybettyboop, sj3365, asianlady4love, VCF1962, sexymermaid6956, clevergirl4U, gourmetfoodnsex, spunky11961, AtomicArtist, sheriamore2, TightbunsBigTits, JustKitt, SingleWarrior, OhBaby199, dz2502, Rickslovely, deliciousngood, goddessofbitches, threeminusone, lovemetouchme5, collaredmuff01, candy69sosweet, womenlooking4fun, and sexyariesgirl for being the last twenty-five visitors to The Venting Blog, and he hopes that they don't mind being made an example of.
see also:
Selections From the BlogLand Dictionary
Selections From the BlogLand Dictionary 2
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22
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Classic Comments #5
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Posted:Aug 9, 2006 11:02 am
Last Updated:Aug 5, 2015 8:08 pm
18170 Views
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The Venting Blog Presents: Classic Comments
Yes folks, that's right. I've been reduced to posting comments that I've made in your blogs. Todays choice comes from [blog Dysgyzed] , by Dysgyzed. The fifth entry into this series is exerpted from her post Physiologically Impossible, from June 20, 2006.
Dysgyzed Ummm..now, I've *very* curious. HOW does one suck toes while fucking?
Seriously. I thought about this and thought about this.
In neither missionary nor rear-entry (doggy style) can one reach both toes and poon-tain at the same time.
Okay, my favorite position is actually to climb on his lap while my partner is sitting in a chair, and ummm...I can't quite manage to have someone in me while I thrust my legs over top of my head to let him reach my toes.
69? That won't work either.
So...would someone please explain to me, or is this really physiologically impossible?
Hmmm...
Color: toenail pink. HeHehe.
Okay, I was sitting here, and all of a sudden, a *Toe-Curling* memory occured to me...yesssss...I know exactly how it can be done! |
I tried that trick after reading this post, and it ended in disaster.
Her leg was beginning to cramp when all of a sudden it flexed, kicking me hard on the nose and sending me spinning backward off the bed!
As I write this from the hospital room where I lie in traction, I can only bemoan that I sucked toe and then had to foot the bill.
jk |
For more Classic Comments see:
Classic Comments 1 (This one's a real hoot folks. Check it out)
Classic Comments 2
Classic Comments 3
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22
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Selections From the BlogLand Dictionary 2
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Posted:Aug 5, 2006 6:51 pm
Last Updated:Jun 4, 2023 9:00 pm
16072 Views
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emo-unctuation ee-moh-unk-shoo-eh-shun
n. The unexpected appearance of emoticon "smiley's" in place of intended text or punctuation. Sometimes called "frowney's" these annoying suckers have driven certain bloggers to distraction.
EXAMPLE: When keithcancook tried to explain that emo-unctuation irked him ninety-nine per cent (99 of the time, he got a black-eye and was heard to exclaim "@#$%^%&!"!
Selections From the BlogLand Dictionary 1 historigasm
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24
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WOMENS BLOG TITLES
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Posted:Aug 2, 2006 9:32 pm
Last Updated:Jan 4, 2012 4:04 pm
20576 Views
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FINAL JEOPARDY CATEGORY
ECCENTRIC BLOGGERS
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THIS YOUNG BLOGGER-KNIGHT PROUDLY PROCLAIMED HIS VIRGINITY WHILE AT THE SAME TIME INSISTING THAT HE KNEW MORE ABOUT SEXUAL TECHNIQUE THAN MOST BLOGLANDERS WHO'D BEEN FUCKING FOR DECADES!
POST QUESTION INSIDE
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17
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HOMETOWN BLOGLAND & COMPLETE THE RHYME
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Posted:Jul 30, 2006 12:47 pm
Last Updated:Feb 21, 2017 9:29 pm
19568 Views
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BLOGLAND JEOPARDY
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ALTHOUGH SHE IS
BLOGLESS IN BLOGLAND,
Ultraviolet_69 CAN
CALL THIS ARIZONA CITY HOME.
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DON'T UPSET THEM BY BEING TOO CRITICAL.
BE KIND AND THEY'LL BE HOSPITABLE.
THEIR POPULARITY IS QUITE CONSIDERABLE,
AND LONDON IS HOME TO...
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THE MOST TONGUE-TYING
TWISTER AMONG ALL OF
OUR POPULAR BLOGGERS'
HOMETOWNS BELONGS TO
THIS CANADIAN PLACE.
HOME OF LUSTYTAURUS.
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THE SHEEP OF ZEALAND LIVE IN FEAR,
FOR THEY ALL KNOW THAT "BULGING'S" NEAR.
IF THEY'RE RUNNING YOU CAN TELL.
THAT "BOY" IS BACK IN...
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WOW! JOPLIN, MISSOURI
IS PROUD TO OFFER US
MO FUN DUE TO THIS
TOTALLY AWESOME BLOGGER.
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HITTING HARD LIKE A KICK ON A BIG BUTT.
LIBGEMOH CAME IN FOR A REBUT.
SHE SAID "DON'T BE SO DROLL",
LIKE AN INTERNET TROLL,
GO READ...
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AMERICAN EXPATRIOT,
humboldthonni BLOGS
FROM THIS CENTRAL
EUROPEAN LOCATION
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HERE'S A BLOG THAT
SELDOM MISSES
BROUGHT TO YOU BY ...
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BLOGGERS CAN FIND
FREELOVE AND
POLITICAL ACTIVISM
IN THIS SOUTH
AFRICAN CITY.
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"SOMETIMES SHE'S SERIOUS" AND NOT-TO-BE
EVERYONES SWEET LITTLE "CUP-OF-TEA".
YET WE'VE GOT AN AFFLICTION
FOR THIS GALS "ADDICTION"
WHO DOESN'T LOVE AMBER...
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BLOGGERS WILL FIND
A TOOTHYSMILE IN THIS
FAMILIAR GREEK CITY.
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WHEN YOU MAIL THIS HAIKU DEVOTEE
DONT EXPECT AN ENGLISH-STYLE TEA
FOR WHEN YOU SHOW YOUR IDIOCY
YOU WILL BE NAMED THE HONOREE,
THE WINNER OF HER WRITING-BEE.
THAT'S WHERE YOU'LL GET THE THIRD DEGREE
AS SHE SETS YOU UP FOR HER VICTORY.
SO WASHINGTON IS WHERE YOU'LL SEE
ALL THEIR NUTS HANGIN' FROM A SOUR APPLE TREE.
WHO IS THIS GAL WITH SUCH DEVILRY?
OUR VERY OWN ...
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WANT MORE? TRY THESE CATEGORIES...
BLJ 1 SIX CATEGORIES
BLJ 2 EXPATBRIT49 and BLOG TRIVIA
BLJ 4 MENS BLOG TITLES
BLJ 5 WOMENS BLOG TITLES
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12
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To link to this blog (keithcancook) use [blog keithcancook] in your messages.
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