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A most uncommon man
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Posted:Jun 2, 2021 2:58 pm
Last Updated:Jun 2, 2021 3:04 pm
2962 Views
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No, I'm not going start singing Mac Davis' "Hard be Humble." I'm certainly not perfect in every way. But on the other hand, I am quite exceptional in many. Now if I was only a foot taller and twenty younger LOL ... In this blog post I am going do my best shed my traditional personal humility and sing my own praises.
There are some who claim that sex all starts in the mind. I believe there is validity this statement. Yes, the genitals a key role, but the driving force is what is happening between our ears, not between our legs. It would seem follow that people with exceptional levels of intelligence would have the potential be more effective lovers. And furthermore, people who choose educate themselves regarding sexual pleasure would also have a better chance of actually being better lovers.
I qualify in both ways. I first became aware of the concept of percentile rankings while I was in elementary school where we took standardized tests. My test results consistently came back in the 99th percentile with the exception of language skills where I placed in the 96th percentile. This pattern continued through my schooling and college entrance testing. What can I say, I'm quite intelligent, and have genius level intellect in math and science related fields.
Because I have long desired to be as good a lover for my partners as I can be, I have taken the time to research sexual pleasure and better understand all the various ways that our bodies respond to sensual and sexual stimulation. In addition to my studies and training in The Tantra, (see blog post - My Hybrid Western Tantra, I have also studied several female authors writing on sexual arousal and pleasure. I have also been attuned to news articles and such. This is where I first learned about the anterior fornix erogenous zone. This is one of the Deep Vagina Erogenous Zones, also called the A-spot. There are also other spots inside many ladies' vaginas which are particularly sensitive to pressure and motion, though not simple touch.
Now in the case of some of these spots it is not enough to know where they are to be found. It is also necessary to have enough penis to reach them, and the proper angles and leverage to thrust in the proper direction for them. This is another area in which I am in that rarefied air of the 99th percentile. While my girth is pretty good at 5-3/4" it is not as exceptional as my length. I checked a site that places your measurements in context with the general population. It found that in an average group of 1,000 men I would rank th in girth. OTOH, my 8" length would be near if not at the top of the list. Yes, there are freaks of nature that are longer and thicker. But in most cases I am larger.
I am also glad I'm not any longer. I have already had the experience of not being able to fully penetrate some partners. Shorter ladies appreciate me because I have that big dick while still being only 5' 7" tall. But in some cases it is a tight fit.
Another area of skill, training, and expertise is in music. This is also an area where training and ability contribute greatly to sexual pleasure. I have a very good sense of rhythm, and am quite coordinated in my movement. I have strong sense of dynamics,seeing each of these as a continuum of possibilities = fast/slow, hard/soft, long/short strokes, other body stimulation and associated firmness of touch. Variation and creativity help keep long sessions exciting and fun. It is only for the "stretch run" when pushing to the BIG O finish that a constant and unchanging approach is appropriate.
My instruments are 6 string electric violin, keyboards, and guitar. The violin training in particular lends itself well to sexual stimulation. Violin performance techniques such as vibrato and tremolo are directly transferable to bedroom activities.
And finally, (yes, I know I tend to be wordy), I adore female energy and choose to interact with my partners in a loving, caring, and respectful manner. Sure, I know there are women who are turned on by other, darker things. Not my thing. What I practice is loving non-attachment. I can devote myself to your pleasure and enjoyment without devoting my life to you, or asking you to do the same. I will always treat you with kindness, consideration and respect.
And in closing, a taste of the good days - my high school yearbook photo from 1975. It's a shame I didn't know what I was doing then 
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Hours of pleasure? "How do y'all make it last THAT long?"
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Posted:Jun 2, 2021 3:27 am
Last Updated:Apr 25, 2024 2:2 pm
4364 Views
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I have always been interested in sex. I think I was eleven or so when I got a copy of the then relatively notorious memoir of a flight attendant - then referred to as stewardesses - Coffee, Tea, or Me? One memorable item from her training was when their instructor warned them against having sex with passengers they meet, telling them they would lose their jobs if they became pregnant.
"An hour of pleasure is not worth losing your career," she advised them.
At this one of the ladies in the course asked in a southern drawl, "How do y'all make it last THAT long?" which drew laughter from her classmates.
That is the question which I address in this blog post. And in truth, an hour is not all that long when you have the right partner, the training and the technique.
Let's get into the training first. This kind of approach to sex pretty much requires having a man who has trained himself in recognizing the physical distinctions in his level of arousal, and who has developed the self-discipline required to be able to pull back the dynamic rather than push it to completion in the moment. This is part of Tantric sexual practice and takes years to fully master.
Next you need to have the right environment. A kitchen table might be a hot place for an impulsive impromptu coupling - nothing wrong with that at all. But it is a completely different type of sexual experience from what I am discussing here. Comfort is a priority that extends to all of the senses in the "enjoy it for hours" approach to sexual and sensual pleasure. Prepare ahead of time. Create a space where you and your partner(s) will feel fully at ease and have no reason to wish to leave other than perhaps bathroom trips. Have everything you anticipate wanting already there and waiting for you.
The things you might wish to consider include having a clean room, (Remember floors and tabletops guys. Horizontal surfaces need regular cleaning.), soft lighting, a comfortable temperature, freshly laundered bedding on an appropriate bed, beverages planned and available, and towels, lube, toys if used, (highly recommended), spare batteries, (again highly recommended) and condoms all handy but not obtrusive.
Scented candles can be nice if not overdone. Also make sure your date is OK with them. A resin censer with frankincense can also be an invigorating touch that is said to enhance sexual pleasure - again being careful to know your device and resins and avoid smoking out your room or offending your date with an unwanted aroma.
Now that you have the environment at least on your radar, the next important element is obviously time. You each need to have enough time available so that you can feel unhurried at every moment you are together. Don't be in a rush to get into bed, or even to touch other than perhaps a greeting hug. Get those beverages out. Spend some time, however much feels appropriate to the overall time available, just talking and catching up. Even if you are close and it hasn't been that long since you saw one another, taking a few moments to just be with each other helps to reestablish intimacy and relatedness.
And if you have the time, a shared meal is a very effective way of creating deeper levels of intimacy. Eating is a primal human need much like sex, and very socializing in general. Eating together brings these elementary "lizard brain" survival elements to the party as well - and they are part of us all, and having that part of our brain on board matters in being able to instinctively feel trusting comfort with our partner. Shared meals can be wonderful early in a relationship. This is a big part of why it is so popular an element of traditional courting.
It is hard to overstate the importance of the interpersonal emotional connection required for this kind of coupling. A man is unlikely to choose to continue putting off his own orgasm while assisting his partner in achieving dozens if he doesn't feel some type of caring connection with her. And a lady is unlikely to achieve those orgasms with a man for whom she feels a cold connection.
OK, so you have your environment prepared and you have established a degree of relatedness and intimacy. As the time comes to touch, go slow again with everything. Hug for a bit, kiss, maybe incorporate some twist into the removal of clothing that prolongs the process or otherwise adds fun and excitement. And as foreplay gains in intensity and eventually leads to penetration, again take things slowly.Take a good bit of time allowing the tempo of thrusting and the depth of penetration build - at least a few minutes.
A note here on sexual positions. There is a perfect position for hours of sex. It is the scissors position. You may know of it.If not I'm sure you can reference the illustration accompanying this post. In the scissors position both partners legs wrap around each other like two crossed pairs of scissors. This enables both to lay comfortably for long stretches. It also allows easy hand access to the primary region of play for finger stimulation and also the use of toys to add sensations when and where appropriate.
I also distinguish here between full blown orgasms versus sequential or train or wave orgasms as they are variously called. After a full blown orgasm a lady is often done for a bit. Not so with the wave orgasms as they can flow freely once they begin. A good massage along the muscles of the spine as part of foreplay can assist in helping the energy and pleasure signals flow.
Meanwhile, always follow your partner's reactions and responses to stay attuned to her level of arousal. Just as you don't want to push yourself over the edge too soon, the same is true for her. When you find either of you getting to a nicely elevated level where you typically might start the push to finish, instead drop the dynamic. Shift to different stroking depths, slow down, be more playful, do whatever comes to you in the moment to shift the feeling. It can still be sensuous and pleasurable, while not as easily leading straight to full orgasm.
Allow this cycle to play out a few times, raising the dynamic and then dropping it, taking her high and then shifting gears. After a bit, maybe ten to fifteen minutes, take a sensations break. Stay inserted while only moving enough to maintain erection. (For guys who make use of drugs such as Cialis this is more easily achieved for longer times.) And use the resting time to touch your partner's body all over. Use a mostly light and playful, moving touch going from place to place. Don't race around her body, but don't linger in any one spot very long. Also avoid losing touch with her body at any point if you can. Explore and touch all over her face, neck, shoulders, breastbone, collarbone, arms, breasts, nipples, belly, thighs, knees, and more. Seek those erogenous zones unique to her that push her buttons.When you find them remember them. Come back to them when it feels right.
By now she is likely experiencing tingly sensations flowing up her spine and into her pleasure centers. Move inside her on occasion even if not needed to stay hard. Doing PC muscle contractions, also known as Kegel exercises, during this portion of things can also be stimulating for her as it causes the penis to temporarily swell.
After a few moments of this you can gradually start picking up the dynamic again. First with light thrusts pushing deeper. Then start to withdraw some and use linger strokes again, going faster and longer, then changing it up. Begin similar cycles to the first group, but incorporating more stimulation of her labia and clitoral hood while thrusting. Timing your stimulation with your thrusts can be very hot for her, as can rolling your knuckles across her clitoral hood. By now her clit itself is likely hidden inside the hood as it will be too sensitive to be exposed to much direct contact. The degree of pressure she can take in this manner might surprise you though it is advisable to start light and build to a more firm pressure. Every lady is different in many ways, this being one of them.
For the next stimulation session you might consider adding some vibrating toys to the mix. I bought a few finger nubby vibrators for this. It adds a nice element to keep things new and fresh after several tens of minutes of play. The vibrator can then be continued into the next thrusting cycles and used in addition to the finger stimulation for her labia and clitoris. Another variation is to shift to mutual oral for a cycle, though it is more disruptive to the general flow.
And eventually either you choose to take a real break for water or food or bathroom or whatever; or one of you had a full orgasm signaling time for an extended break or ending the session. From there it depends on how each partner feels. Getting things revved back up again can be fun, but there is only so much that lube and good technique can do to minimize skin irritation over time - especially if condoms are in use. Use common sense and be considerate of your partner.
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My Hybrid Western Tantra
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Posted:Jun 1, 2021 11:57 am
Last Updated:Jun 2, 2021 12:41 pm
3639 Views
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In its purest form, the Tantra is a comprehensive religion with associated jargon, dogma, and ritual. Sexual relations with their related sharing of energy are a central part of the religion.
My approach Tantra is largely pleasure based. retains the training and some of the practices while dropping the more dogmatic aspects. I have my own spiritual practices involving morning meditations and Yoga. And some of my practices are informed by my knowledge of Tantra, but would not properly be called Tantric spirituality. I would also not call myself a religious man in most senses of the word.
Our culture, and my background, do not lend themselves well pure Tantra which is why I approach a bit differently. On a physiological level, the nature of pleasure is explained well with Tantric ideas. On a conceptual level, imagine that your genitals create a biochemical and/or electrochemical substance during sex which flows up your spine and into your brain to provide you with the experience of sexual and sensual pleasure. are other body part with sensitive nerve bundles that also transmit pleasure signals, but not with the potentially orgasmic energy created in the genitals.
If you use various practices which enable and encourage the flow of this substance up your spine it will result in more intensely enjoyable sensual and sexual experiences. One of my early Tantric lovers had mastered this process. She was able prepare and relax her body such that "all lines were open" so speak. Once she experienced her first orgasm of a session she was proverbially off the races. Even minor touch such as gently grazing the side of her breast could give her a rippling wave of pleasure. She could experience dozens of orgasms in an hour.
For myself, from the perspective, Tantra has entailed training my body and developing the discipline resist quick pleasure in exchange for deeper pleasure overall. The general idea is allow ones arousal rise until you near the point of ejaculation, and experience orgasmic sensations while still not releasing. Yes, for those unaware, orgasm and ejaculation are independent phenomenon. They typically arise together which is why most men believe they are synonymous. is possible experience orgasm without ejaculation, and experience ejaculation without orgasm. If you can master being able experience orgasm without ejaculation it makes multiple orgasms reasonably possible.
Developing this capability and discipline took time and practice, much of it solo. (And to be frank, while its not typically acknowledged due to Joycelyn Elders Syndrome, many if not most adults' most frequent sex "partner" is themselves. This should not be a source of embarrassment or reason to not pursue pleasurable activities.) Much of the training involves becoming more aware of ones own body and the subtle signals it sends as arousal nears the "go" point - that stage of sexual arousal when both orgasm and ejaculation are becoming imminent. With years of training I have learned to distinguish my level of arousal to a fine enough degree that I know when to temporarily slow down or stop in order to not release at that time. And just as importantly, I have developed the discipline to CHOOSE to do so. I know the value of the payoff later on.
Another benefit of this training is the ability to stop intercourse at any moment without having "blue balls" or other physical discomfort from pent up and unreleased cum. I have no need to ask my partner to "hand in " until I cum. is not necessary. I have cum enough times in my life that one more isn't going make or break my world. And if my partner has had enough then she has had enough. I get enough enjoyment from the lovemaking itself. Having a "happy ending" has lost a lot of its luster over the years. Yes, I enjoy it, but it is not the point of having sex for me anymore.
are many implications of this for my partners. One obvious one is time. This approach sex and sensuality is not one be rushed. Ladies are looking for the average "5 minutes and 24 seconds" session of vaginal intercourse are likely not good candidates for Tantric sex.
By example, a recent date showed up at 1:40 in the afternoon and left at 8:50 in the evening. Now we probably hung out chatting and catching up for an hour before we got in bed. And we took a break for dinner around 6:00. But other than that we were mostly playing in various forms. Before dinner we never left the bed for over two hours, and that was just to grab a drink of water. She literally had several dozen rolling orgasms before dinner, though none that took her over the edge into vaginal spasms and full blown hard orgasm. We got to that after dinner. Then she was done, as we both knew she would be. Not every one of our dates has involved over four hours of active sex, just the ones when we have that much time available.
Another is physical conditioning and sexual endurance. Many ladies simply aren't up for the physicality of this approach to sexual pleasure. It often takes some building up on the endurance side - something that takes some patience, but is a fun process to play out. It takes a different mindset to look at sex in this way as well. Being able to patiently relax, and be fully present in the moment to the sensations in your body makes a huge difference. A big hurdle to experiencing deepened sexual and sensual pleasure is getting past the fear of the intensity of the sensations, and letting go of inhibiting mind and muscle habits that jump in to "save" you from all that pleasure. I believe most ladies have the potential to experience these kinds of multiple rolling orgasms if they are with the right partner.
What is not required for my partners is any kind of personal spiritual practice. It's not a part of the version of Tantra which I choose to practice. You are welcome to incorporate meditation and other practices while with me, but they aren't necessary by any means. OTOH, if you are interested in learning a detailed approach to Kundalini meditation that is something for which I can provide instructions.
I am also open to any questions that members here at Senior Sizzle may have regarding these practices. I am happy to share my knowledge and experiences with those have an interest. If you have a question feel free send me a . I will do my best respond in a timely fashion.
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Former cab driver and nuke plant worker = wuss? ... Wow.
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Posted:May 30, 2021 4:39 pm
Last Updated:May 30, 2021 4:47 pm
2752 Views
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I recently completed the Senior Sizzle Sex Academy course titled, "Meet more women online."
While there was some information in there that I consider valuable, much of it was disgusting. The primary advice given guys increase their success with online dating is act like manipulative jerks and treat women like inferiors.
That's right, Ladies. That "smartass guy" who kept tossing light insults your way and telling you how you're not in his league? It was all what he was taught to do by the so-called Master Playahs. Hell, the lines he used could easily have been copied from the course material. You wouldn't know any different and think he was clever and witty. No, not clever and witty,just good at memorizing bullshit to snow you with. It's all designed to put YOU on the defensive and give him the upper hand in dealing with you. (Don't believe me? Check it out for yourself. Chapter One is all about how to be a supreme asshole to get more sex.)
Otherwise you get labeled a "Wuss" for not being a manipulative jerk and instead treating women with kindness and respect. I find it hard to believe that it makes me a wuss if I choose to not make fun of you because you are short and chubby. But according to the Masters, that is exactly what I'm supposed to do to knock you off balance and gain the upper hand. Yep they advise to take advantage of your emotional insecurities in order to make you think that they are superior to you. Feel good about this? How do you like knowing that you are being intentionally treated like shit in order to manipulate you into bed? I don't know about you, but I would resent the hell out of this "Bro" bullshit.
I know in my heart and in my actions that I have far more courage than most of these manipulative scumbags. I doubt many of them would have the balls to drive the 4 - midnight Yellow Cab shift in Philly. I seriously doubt that any of them would have the balls to volunteer for the emergency response crew at a nuclear power plant. These are both things that this man they call a wuss has done. What have they done? Called a woman inferior.
This is fact. After my freshman year of college I wanted to stay in Philadelphia for the summer to be near my then girlfriend. To make this work I got a job driving a cab in the evenings. Being the bicentennial summer in Philly, it was rewarding wor And while I encountered some situations that could have been threatening, I was always able stay calm and manage my way safety. I eventually got my own cab, number 637, I still use the 37 part in various ways such as my username here.
Then as a graduate in physics I got my first professional job at Oyster Creek Nuclear Generating Station. After a few there I chose volunteer be one of computer department members on the plant's emergency response team. I took this responsibility on because I was the one who had the best knowledge of the system that fed data to the control room operators. I wanted to be the one there because I knew that I would be the most effective in that position. Fortunately the only times I needed to respond were during NRC mandated drills. If Oyster Creek had an issue then the central Jersey shore was all endangered. We were an identical plant to Fukushima Unit 2, a GE 620 MWe BWR in a Mark IV containment.
This background came in handy during the accident in 20. I wrote several blog posts at Daily Kos during that time. Some of them provided general knowledge about the various levels of fuel containment and their modes of failure. Others kept track of the daily status of the plant and their implications. I was also in touch with a former co-worker during that time who was still working in the industry and able to provide some of the info that wasn't being generally reported.
So yeah, call me a wuss because I choose to treat women like human beings instead of as toys to be emotionally abused and manipulated for my personal pleasure. My bad, I guess.
But Tantraman37, you ask, Isn't all of that sexual action making them better lovers? After all, practice makes perfect!
As someone who has coached and been coached in various endeavors, no. Not true. They might get lucky and pick up a trick or from a generous and sharing lover along the way. But the mindset that is self-centered and selfish enough do these playah games is not all that concerned about YOUR experience. Practicing mediocre technique a lot only reinforces mediocrity. Typically a man who cares enough about women take the time learn be a good lover is not going be a man who pulls these bullshit moves try score.
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So I had my first UGLY interaction at Senior Sizzle
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Posted:May 29, 2021 3:21 pm
Last Updated:May 29, 2021 5:32 pm
1769 Views
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While in the midst of a promising message back-and-forth with a couple in Roseburg we had reached the point of picking a time that was workable. Being an hour-plus drive from Eugene I wanted to at least have a sense that there was a reasonable chance of things clicking for us.
And then I noticed I had an email from the site. It was a notification that this couple had posted a comment to one of my photos. Cool. So I went to check it to discover a rather insulting comment that I will not choose to repeat here. Apparently there is a 73 year old man in Roseburg who enjoys trolling people and sabotaging potential dates for his wife.
In my next message I stated that I doubted that things would work considering what they had written about me. I told them that I don't like people who throw out personal insults. The response I got back from them told me what an asshole I am. Sweet people!
{If there is any strange syntax in this post it is not because of what I wrote. This blog software drops small words t random - words like "me" "to" etc. Very frustrating. In this one the first two ppgs were fine, then it started to garble.)
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Babes in Toyland ...
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Posted:May 29, 2021 12:38 pm
Last Updated:May 29, 2021 3:12 pm
2028 Views
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Yes, a Christmas-like title is appropriate for this post as you will see ...
My long time FWB and I got together recently to try some experimentation with toys. She has had issues with extreme dryness and thin skin. We thought maybe some gentle toy interaction could work for her. And so I went to Adam and Eve online and bought a couple of vibes and a nice maintenance kit for them. I got a finger nubby and a G-spot finger vibrator.
While we were checking them and discussing possibilities we turned on the G-spot vibe and went through the various vibration patterns - it has . When we got to the seventh we were both giggling as the three pulse repeating pattern was in the exact cadence of "Jingle Bell"s
So, cut to later in the evening. We are having a wonderful time with sensual play, lots of snuggling and kissing and sensuous touch. I fire up the electronics and all is going quite well. She is really enjoying the G-spot vibe and getting lost in her sensations. I step through the patterns to see which might be more effective for her in the moment, and am careful to jump past Jingle Bells to get back to the start of the sequence. All is blissful in the world.
Then as her arousal increases I begin the process again of trying new patterns for her. this time I don't catch Jingle Bells until it had completed the three pulse 'phrase" Then realizing what it is I quickly jump to the next ... but not quick enough.
"What's the matter? You don't like Jingle Bells?"
As we started laughing at this she followed up with, "I can't be having that, a Jewish ."
And while the mood was broken and the erotic episode was hopelessly over, the laughter we shared was the best either of us have had in several months. And now when people ask us what "our song" is, we have an answer!
On edit, I hope I don't need to edit blog posts often. The site software converts special characters to commands like ". anywhere there are quote marks or apostrophe's. ROYAL FUCKING PAIN IN THE ASS TO FIX THEM ALL.
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To link to this blog (tantraman37) use [blog tantraman37] in your messages.
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