I KNEW A MAN WHO MADE HIS OWN COFFIN  

spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
29790 posts
12/17/2021 7:04 am
I KNEW A MAN WHO MADE HIS OWN COFFIN

The Lindner Coffin Calendar


At work I met a colleague who was making his own coffin. It was his hobby. He kept his coffin in his attic ready be brought down when he died. At first, I thought this was an odd hobby. But I then thought it was a great idea; he could personalise a coffin for his funeral and probably save money because coffins are very expensive.

The man who invented throat lozenges died last week. There was no coffin at his funeral!

Lindner, the largest maker of coffins in Poland, produces a calendar of its coffins using scantily-clad models; above is Miss December hauling her coffin along a street. All monies raised through the sales of its calendars are donated charity, but the Catholic Church is not at all impressed by this marketing stunt.

Glass coffins are now available, but whether they become popular remains be seen!

Have you made any plans for your funeral?
Do you want be buried or cremated?


I have started think about my funeral. I want a no-fuss, cheap, green funeral. I do not want a religious as I am an atheist. I just want be buried in a biodegradable coffin with a tree planted top with a party afterwards for people to get<b> drunk </font></b>and behave badly. Perhaps I will get a plaque for the tree with the words, I am fucked if there is a god!

I have been told that necrophilia is dead boring!

Katie Price, a former big-breasted glamour model, was planning to sell coffins with bling; her prototype coffin is shown below. Not to be outdone, the UK-based Glitter Coffin Company produces bespoke glitter coffins; it sells coffins to funeral directors worldwide. The coffins are made to order and come in a variety of colours - black, blue, gold, pink, purple and silver; below is its pink glitter coffin.

A man tried to see me a coffin today. I told him that is the last thing I need!

Katie Price coffin


Glitter coffin


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/17/2021 7:06 am

Why couldn’t Count Dracula’s wife sleep?
Because of his coffin!


ltrskr 74M  
5151 posts
12/17/2021 8:08 am

The son of the owner of a Funeral Home, one of the richest families in his small town got married.
A big event, the Mayor, a Congressman, Police Chief, front page of the local newspaper!
A few days later, small announcement, third page:
It was reported that the new bride of local funeral home owners son retuned home shortly after midnight! Very upset, scared and half naked she told her parents that when they reached the Honeymoon cottage he told her to get completely naked, get in bed, lay on her back and be real still.......
True story!


author51 59F  
130010 posts
12/17/2021 8:18 am

I posted that throat lozenge joke on FB this morning as it was funny my friend.. Marketing coffins with scantily clad women seems kind of weird in a way..Death and sex do not seem to go together unless one dies while having sex...lol. Hmmm. Inspiration there for my afternoon blog post in the future..lol.

I am being cremated actually but that Bling coffin has me re thinking that one..lol.It would have to be Red of course.... xoxo


Tmptrzz 59F  
107038 posts
12/17/2021 8:26 am

This is certainly an intriguing topic, quite unusual are some of these coffins. And I have to say it was a great idea for the man you know to make his own coffin, sure saved himself a lot of money because they are quite expensive.

Have you made any plans for your funeral? No I have not.

Do you want to be buried or cremated? I plan on being cremated, so that I can be shared amongst my kids..

I hope your Friday is a great start to your weekend..

Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on..


Weeload2 59M
1104 posts
12/17/2021 8:27 am

    Quoting spunkycumfun:
    Why couldn’t Count Dracula’s wife sleep?
    Because of his coffin!
... because of his coffin ! hahaha

π•‹π•™π•’π•Ÿπ•œπ•€ 𝕗𝕠𝕣 π•“π•–π•šπ•Ÿπ•˜ π•ͺ𝕠𝕦


lok4fun500 M
51906 posts
12/17/2021 8:37 am

We have two spots of land in local cemetery where we will be planted I don't want big funeral.


windsjohn 71M  
798 posts
12/17/2021 9:36 am

I'm going to be cremated just like we did my parents. In a cardboard box and I paid to push them into the oven. One has to beware of many unscrupulous funeral directors. many times they cremate more than one person at a time and then parcel out the ashes. Like who would know. That's why I was there to see the whole process through.


Paulxx001 65M  
22616 posts
12/17/2021 10:23 am

I've got the playlist more or less figured out.
I guess someone else, will have to hire the DJ. πŸ˜Žβ—β—


staci_19702 51T  
3767 posts
12/17/2021 10:29 am

Ha!! I love this post!

Have a great day! πŸ’‹
Staci


citizen4722 64M  
74582 posts
12/17/2021 1:45 pm

Have you made any plans for your funeral? - Yes, I do have a funeral plan...I'm still paying for it!
Do you want to be buried or cremated? - Cremated. I hate worms!

I hate it at weddings when some old dear prods me and says, "You're next."
They soon stopped when I started saying it to them at funerals.


ltrskr 74M  
5151 posts
12/17/2021 2:30 pm

Yep, Just cremate me, scatter my ashes out back!
Funeral services r one of the biggest rip offs in the in the country!

Great post, interesting to hear all the thoughts and opinions!


TicklePlease 54F  
13851 posts
12/17/2021 2:54 pm

Check out Ghana coffins... when I was at a museum on one of my travels, there was an exhibit dedicated specifically to them, apparently custom coffins are big in Africa. You can be buried in pretty much anything you want! My mom has a corrugated cardboard coffin picked out, and has committed to an environmentally friendly funeral when the time comes.

I thought about signing up for some post mortem medical use thing... apparently there's a need for bodies for education.


1bighammer1000 57M
4304 posts
12/17/2021 6:47 pm

I am planning on being buried with my dogs and horses. I have a small hill with two huge oak trees at the top, my dogs and horses are already there and my nephew's know where to plant me.

Anything worth doing is worth doing right


pal334 68M  
45821 posts
12/18/2021 5:37 am

As a part of my retirement, the Military offers free coffin (a nice one), formal Military cemetary space and a Military ceremony. Alternatively the is cremation service

Please cum visit my blog,,,,,,,,,,,,pal334



smartasswoman 64F  
35813 posts
12/18/2021 12:13 pm

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    I've got the playlist more or less figured out.
    I guess someone else, will have to hire the DJ. πŸ˜Žβ—β—
That's as far as I've gotten with funeral planning...sometimes I'll hear a song and think to myself, 'that would be good for a funeral'. One that pops to mind is "I'll Fly Away". I like the positive slant to it. (Paul is probably not having any bluegrass at HIS funeral though).

I used to always think I would be cremated, but these days with climate change it seems like a bad idea to burn anything - maybe a green funeral like spunky is planning.

My friend who died recently had a VERY plain unvarnished pine coffin - but did pick out a beautiful, unique headstone. So in keeping with her very practical nature - why spend $10,000 on a fancy coffin that will soon be invisible underground?


BeccaLuvs 59F
20895 posts
12/19/2021 8:40 am

Sexy coffins - whatever next Spunky?! Guess we should all think about it - the "what when it happens" - I haven't, only I've always been terrified of fires! OH, and thank you, making me laugh about how you would do it!

..... And always 'hold onto all those sexy thoughts'!
(Remember if you feel like taking part in some sexy fun then click here!) Come on Some Sketch Fun
And Now How About 39Me39 Watching 39You39 If you39d like that Please Comment - So if you would like - click here as well!


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:34 pm

    Quoting ltrskr:
    The son of the owner of a Funeral Home, one of the richest families in his small town got married.
    A big event, the Mayor, a Congressman, Police Chief, front page of the local newspaper!
    A few days later, small announcement, third page:
    It was reported that the new bride of local funeral home owners son retuned home shortly after midnight! Very upset, scared and half naked she told her parents that when they reached the Honeymoon cottage he told her to get completely naked, get in bed, lay on her back and be real still.......
    True story!
That's spooky!


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:37 pm

    Quoting author51:
    I posted that throat lozenge joke on FB this morning as it was funny my friend.. Marketing coffins with scantily clad women seems kind of weird in a way..Death and sex do not seem to go together unless one dies while having sex...lol. Hmmm. Inspiration there for my afternoon blog post in the future..lol.

    I am being cremated actually but that Bling coffin has me re thinking that one..lol.It would have to be Red of course.... xoxo
Death and sex don't mix is what the Catholic church also said, but given that sex is life maybe they do mix!


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:38 pm

    Quoting Tmptrzz:
    This is certainly an intriguing topic, quite unusual are some of these coffins. And I have to say it was a great idea for the man you know to make his own coffin, sure saved himself a lot of money because they are quite expensive.

    Have you made any plans for your funeral? No I have not.

    Do you want to be buried or cremated? I plan on being cremated, so that I can be shared amongst my kids..

    I hope your Friday is a great start to your weekend..
I can see where you're coming from; ashes can be shared.


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:40 pm

    Quoting Weeload2:
    ... because of his coffin ! hahaha
I'm pleased the Count Dracula joke got a hahaha from you.


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:41 pm

    Quoting lok4fun500:
    We have two spots of land in local cemetery where we will be planted I don't want big funeral.
It's good to know where we'll end up in death. It's a bit sad though.


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:43 pm

    Quoting windsjohn:
    I'm going to be cremated just like we did my parents. In a cardboard box and I paid to push them into the oven. One has to beware of many unscrupulous funeral directors. many times they cremate more than one person at a time and then parcel out the ashes. Like who would know. That's why I was there to see the whole process through.
Funeral directors don't get challenged enough; it's easy money when dealing with people in grief!


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:44 pm

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    I've got the playlist more or less figured out.
    I guess someone else, will have to hire the DJ. πŸ˜Žβ—β—
I'd love to know what's on your playlist.


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:46 pm

I'm pleased you like the post., Death!


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:47 pm

    Quoting citizen4722:
    Have you made any plans for your funeral? - Yes, I do have a funeral plan...I'm still paying for it!
    Do you want to be buried or cremated? - Cremated. I hate worms!

    I hate it at weddings when some old dear prods me and says, "You're next."
    They soon stopped when I started saying it to them at funerals.
I'd love to see your playlist for your funeral. Would it be a quiz!


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:49 pm

    Quoting ltrskr:
    Yep, Just cremate me, scatter my ashes out back!
    Funeral services r one of the biggest rip offs in the in the country!

    Great post, interesting to hear all the thoughts and opinions!
I'm just wondering whether you'd like your ashes scattered somewhere in particular.


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:53 pm

    Quoting TicklePlease:
    Check out Ghana coffins... when I was at a museum on one of my travels, there was an exhibit dedicated specifically to them, apparently custom coffins are big in Africa. You can be buried in pretty much anything you want! My mom has a corrugated cardboard coffin picked out, and has committed to an environmentally friendly funeral when the time comes.

    I thought about signing up for some post mortem medical use thing... apparently there's a need for bodies for education.
I have just checked out Ghana coffins, amazing! Africans certainly know how to celebrate life and death.
I'm also happy for my body to be donated to science, maybe we'll meet up on some post mortem table with students poking at our dead bodies!


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:56 pm

    Quoting 1bighammer1000:
    I am planning on being buried with my dogs and horses. I have a small hill with two huge oak trees at the top, my dogs and horses are already there and my nephew's know where to plant me.
Your nephew has got quite a responsibilty!


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 2:57 pm

    Quoting pal334:
    As a part of my retirement, the Military offers free coffin (a nice one), formal Military cemetary space and a Military ceremony. Alternatively the is cremation service
Clearly, and rightly, this is one of the perks being in the military.


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 3:02 pm

    Quoting smartasswoman:
    That's as far as I've gotten with funeral planning...sometimes I'll hear a song and think to myself, 'that would be good for a funeral'. One that pops to mind is "I'll Fly Away". I like the positive slant to it. (Paul is probably not having any bluegrass at HIS funeral though).

    I used to always think I would be cremated, but these days with climate change it seems like a bad idea to burn anything - maybe a green funeral like spunky is planning.

    My friend who died recently had a VERY plain unvarnished pine coffin - but did pick out a beautiful, unique headstone. So in keeping with her very practical nature - why spend $10,000 on a fancy coffin that will soon be invisible underground?
The most popular funeral song here in the UK is Frank Sinatra's 'My Way'. I guess it covers all bases. But I think Chic' s Le Freak would be more fun.


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 3:06 pm

    Quoting  :

You are dead right, funerals are for the living. And why should those dying have to plan for those living?
I'd donate my body to science as well.


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/19/2021 3:08 pm

    Quoting BeccaLuvs:
    Sexy coffins - whatever next Spunky?! Guess we should all think about it - the "what when it happens" - I haven't, only I've always been terrified of fires! OH, and thank you, making me laugh about how you would do it!
I'm terrified of fires too; let's just get buried together. That would flummox people!


PonyGirl1965 56F
22090 posts
12/20/2021 1:19 am

I will be cremated and hopefully scattered in many different locations or in my kids yards


spunkycumfun 62M/67F  
41171 posts
12/20/2021 4:30 am

    Quoting PonyGirl1965:
    I will be cremated and hopefully scattered in many different locations or in my kids yards
There'll be no arguments between your kids with that plan.


Become a member to create a blog