Ich versteh's nicht - I just don't get it
|
Posted:Nov 6, 2011 12:04 am
Last Updated:Nov 6, 2011 12:05 am
8523 Views
|
Wenn mir eine Frau "Fick dich!" zuruft, antworte ich freudig "Aber gern, bei dir oder bei mir?" Bisher stand noch keine zu ihrem Angebot. Irgendwie raff ich das nicht. 
When a woman yells "Fuck you!" at me, I'm pleased and reply: "Yeah, like it! At your place or mine?" Somehow it didn't work out yet. I don't get it somehow. 
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Witze
|
Posted:Oct 29, 2011 7:36 am
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2011 11:53 am
13688 Views
|
"Mach mir ein Kind!"
"Kinder werden nicht gemacht, sondern geboren."
"Dann bohr mir eins."
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Lügen beim Sex - Lies While Having Sex
|
Posted:Oct 29, 2011 6:30 am
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8687 Views
|
English version below
Die größten Lügen beim Sex:
"Ich spritze nicht, Ehrenwort!"
"Ich zieh ihn raus, bevor ich komme!"
"Keine Sorge, ich hab die Pille genommen."
The biggest lies during sex:
"Big promise, I won't ejaculate!"
"I'll pull out, before I cum!"
"Don't worry, I'm on contraceptives."
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Night Time
|
Posted:Oct 16, 2011 10:40 am
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8041 Views
|
It' getting night time:
Time to stop talking.
Time to get real.
Time to get fucked.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
The Vagina Dialogues !
|
Posted:Oct 13, 2011 1:04 pm
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8223 Views
|
Monologues? How boring! Pitiful! What a shame, talking to yourself.
We do it better: dialogues!
Welcome to the vagina dialogues 
The pussy called the penis:
You must more often pound this!
The cunt yelled at the dick:
Push it deeper, hit and click!
What the penis did reply:
I'm cuming when you sigh.
The clit did tell the member:
Fill me up until December.
The dick said to the slut:
I prefer you to the butt!
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Die Vagina-Dialoge
|
Posted:Oct 12, 2011 2:13 pm
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8723 Views
|
Monologe? Wie langweilig! Wir machen's nicht unter Dialogen!
Die Vagina-Dialoge
Die Muschi sprach zum Glied,
Schau, wie's in mir aussieht!
Der Muttermund schrie: Eichel!
Gib endlich deinen Speichel!
Der Penis sprach zur Möse:
Gleich spritz ich, sei nicht böse!
Der Penis sprach zur Fotze:
Mir ist so heiß, ich kotze!
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Frauen sollten den ersten Schritt machen. Women should do the first step
|
Posted:Oct 9, 2011 11:56 am
Last Updated:Oct 12, 2011 2:16 pm
13251 Views
|
Much waste of time will be avoided, if women do the first step and send an email. I won't think bad about them! Just do it.
Frauen sollten sich trauen, den ersten Schritt zu machen. So wird viel Zeitverschwendung gespart. Ich denke bestimmt nichts schlechtes dabei.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Tattoo Joke
|
Posted:Oct 5, 2011 11:34 am
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8216 Views
|
The advantages of having a $ tattooed on your penis:
Despite all crisis, you can see your money grow!
Finally you can decide, where your money is put to!
Your choice, in which hole your money disappears!
Now you can enjoy the up and down of your money.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
The Condom Size Test
|
Posted:Aug 24, 2011 6:55 am
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8430 Views
|
A guy goes into a drugstore to buy condoms.
"What size?" asks the clerk.
"I don't know."
"Go see Sophie in aisle 6."
He goes over to see Sophie, who grabs him in the crotch, and yells, "Medium!" The guy is mortified! He hurries over to pay and leaves quickly.
Another guy comes in to buy condoms, and gets sent to Sophie in aisle 6. Sophie grabs him and yells, "Large!" The guy struts over to the register, pays, and leaves.
A high school comes in to buy condoms. "What size?" The replies "I've never done this before. I don't know what size."
The clerk sends him over to Sophie in aisle 6. She grabs him and yells "Clean up in aisle 6!"
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
The Confession
|
Posted:Aug 24, 2011 6:48 am
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8334 Views
|
An old man walked into the confessional at the cathedral and said to the priest, "Father, I'm 80 years old, married, have four and 11 grandchildren. Last night I had an affair, and I made love to two 18 year old girls. Both of them."
The priest replied, "Well, my , when was the last time you were in confession?"
"Never Father, I'm atheist."
The priest paused, and then asked, "So then, why are you telling me?"
"Hey, I'm telling everybody."
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
beim Arzt
|
Posted:Aug 24, 2011 6:43 am
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8660 Views
|
Zwei Rentner treffen sich in der Arztpraxis. Sagt der eine: "Na, wie geht's deinem Zucker?"
"Der zuckt schon lange nicht mehr!"
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Nach dem Arztbesuch
|
Posted:Aug 24, 2011 6:42 am
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8612 Views
|
"Der Arzt hat gesagt, ich habe wunderschöne Beine und Brüste!"
"Hat er nichts von Deinem Arsch gesagt?"
"Nein, von Dir war nicht die Rede!"
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
More Bad Puns
|
Posted:Aug 22, 2011 1:38 pm
Last Updated:Apr 30, 2024 12:3 pm
8079 Views
|
Why don't aliens eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
.
Lovers are like parking spaces: the good ones are taken!
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (makesupregnant) use [blog makesupregnant] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
| |
|
1
|
2
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
251
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
|
|
|
|
