The Alpha Test - Part Deux?  

New2Midlo 52M  
712 posts
10/1/2021 11:56 am

Last Read:
10/8/2021 11:26 am

The Alpha Test - Part Deux?

Most women desire to partner with an alpha male; even those who may be alphas themselves. That's been proven over numerous studies and my own observations. Most men portray themselves as alphas, whether they use that term or not. While not universal, some women utilize the 'dinner test' to help identify those who really aren't. We've covered this before, but the short version is she'll ask what he wants to do for dinner and if he can't make a decision, even a poor one, he reveals himself as a non-alpha. I think I've identified another potential alpha test, but want to gather more input from the fairer sex before I memorialize it as such.

Let's set the stage for where I've observed this potential test taking place. It's a first or second date where things are going well and there's some high quality kissing taking place. Passion has ramped and the intoxication associated with kissing someone new is in full effect (I fucking love that.). Suddenly, mid smooch, the woman breaks away, her words indicating the night's festivities are over. At that point, the man has two choices. He can accept her word and part company or physically return her to the kissing. This has happened to me a number of times, but I'll share two examples that remain fresh in my mind, and how I responded to the situation.

The first was a second date with a woman (duh), who I'd cooked dinner for. We were pretty hot and heavy, various pieces of clothing having already been discarded, when out of nowhere, she stood up and said she has to go. Because wine was involved and I was in total lust, with her body language indicating reciprocation, I stood up and threw her back on the sofa, saying she wasn't going anywhere. On a side note, my actions were insanely out of character for me. I think the reason I became physical was she was giving off vibes that such actions would be welcome. Turns out I was correct, because when I sat back down, she was en fuego, straddling me as we resumed our passion. Fun night.

In another instance, for our first date, I met a woman at a local winery (Missouri wine, blech!) and things went well. Because I'm a gentleman, I walked her to her car, and because I found her attractive (and her body language indicated a reciprocal attraction), I kissed her goodnight. I found her kiss to be sufficiently enjoyable that I continued to kiss her. After a few minutes of this, again as the intoxication kicked in, she disengaged, said she had a great time, and turned to get in her car. I wasn't done kissing her at that point, so I grabbed her, spun her around, and threw another lip lock on her. This action was very well received and we engaged in a few more minutes of kissing, before parting ways the night.

Lest some think me a borderline bad person, there's one last key piece of information to share. In every instance where this has happened to me, my date's body language directly contradicted her words. In the second example, despite my date verbally disengaging and turning around, she didn't physically move to get into her car. When the first woman got off the sofa, stating it was time for her to leave, she stood within arm's reach. She also got up twice more, also staying within arm's reach and being forcibly tossed back onto the sofa, before I realized what she really wanted.

With those in mind, as well as other less memorable occasions I haven't shared, there emerges a clear trend. A connection is established, with physical interaction being desired by both parties. The woman disengages at what can be best described as a highly unusual stopping point. Her body language indicates she remains open for additional interaction. The male physically takes control of the woman and the physical interaction resumes in a more passionate manner, perhaps indicating that was her intent the whole time.

And so, we end where we began, with me asking for input from my female readers. How many of you have consciously engaged in such behavior? If so, for what purpose? Did you want him to take the same actions I did? For those of you who haven't, reflect on your entanglements and share if maybe you've done so unintentionally. Guys, feel free to share any similar experiences (that didn't wind up with you having to call an attorney). Any other input is welcome.

For the record, I do not endorse, condone a man forcing himself on a woman against her will, solely because of his wants. Those are not the actions of a real man. If you're unable to discern a woman's true intentions, with zero question, you stop when she says stop. Period. Oh, and get vaccinated, you dumb fuck.

New2Midlo 52M  
1075 posts
10/1/2021 11:57 am

Do your lips say no when your body is saying yes?

mufdiver69er2 61M  
1951 posts
10/1/2021 4:21 pm

id wager..and i am not a betting man..that many women would deny this while having done it...

woop woop

New2Midlo replies on 10/2/2021 12:14 pm:
I agree with you. Same as the dinner test; I don't think women intentionally test guys with it, rather it becomes a marker, should they fail.

Paulxx001 65M  
22616 posts
10/1/2021 4:31 pm

Alcohol always warps reason.

An actual test of will and desire — would have been a 'sober' kiss. Let's face it; most women play by that 'third date' rule. I've educated my daughters in that triad of math.

Most men can count to three, and THAT skill is what women look for. It's NOT about body language or what the endorphins are screaming; it's about the gestation of feelings. Women, and some men, don't want to be fooled by a 'one-off.'

I've read where good wine has to be aged to be deemed worthy.

Then again, what the fuck do I know about wine? 🤔

New2Midlo replies on 10/1/2021 6:01 pm:
To be clear, alcoholic beverages were consumed at reasonable levels.

I don't recall mentioning anything about sex being involved in the subject.

Jules1590 54F
8151 posts
10/1/2021 9:47 pm

Yummm... that physical domination and demonstration of primal urge is highly intoxicating.

But you're right, you absolutely need to know how to read the room.

To answer your question, I have never "consciously" engaged in that coy, "oh, I have to leave," if I did not.

Now, has that scenario played out for me? Absofucknlutely. Happily, many times over. However, there was a genuine, albeit reluctant need to depart. Could I be summarily cajoled into staying even though I had a hard stop and somewhere else to be? Spin me around, grab the back of my head while you shove your tongue in my mouth? Toss me on the couch and land on top of me. Yep, looks like I've lost all sense of reason, time and space and I'm gonna be a little late for the next thing.

And if its THAT good....? ummmm...what thing was it again...?

Great post.

New2Midlo replies on 10/2/2021 12:12 pm:
If physical domination driven by pure lust makes you all tingly, I'll share another experience in the same vein. This was during an actual relationship (it's been known to happen!) with a woman that kept my desire on full boil all the damned time. Her, um, construction was such that intercourse was like doing it with a sex toy scientifically engineered for maximum pleasure. The sex was amazing for both of us and we'd spend the better part of most weekends in bed. She was also incredibly submissive, so I'd taken ownership of her long before this happened.

During one of our weekends full of debauchery, we were between rounds, with me moments away from initiating the next one. It was at that moment she decided to get up for a drink. I leapt from the bed and grabbed her, ripped open her robe, and roughly tossed her on the bed, with her legs over the edge.
"You're my property and I'm done fucking you when I decide I'm done fucking you."
I pulled her legs over my shoulders and fucked her hard until she orgasmed.
"Now I'm done fucking you."
She later told me that was the hottest thing that had ever happened to her.

Reading the room is very important. The woman I had to repeatedly throw on the sofa wound up with me planting her face down on the cold granite of my kitchen island, for being a dirty whore and getting off on being tossed around. She'd already said she didn't want to have sex that night, but once I'd physically taken control of her, she was throwing out some definite vibes she wanted to be taken forcefully, bent over the counter. But without 100% certainty, that was a no go for me. FWIW, while she was faceplanted on the counter where I released pressure, allowing her to escape, but as I suspected, she was getting off on the scene.

G000dbuddy 34M  
1676 posts
10/1/2021 11:30 pm

do not endorse, condone a man forcing himself on a woman against her will, solely because of his wants. Those are not the actions of a real man. Agree


Jules1590 54F
8151 posts
10/5/2021 6:06 am

New2Midlo replies on 10/2/2021 3:12 pm:
"Her, um, construction was such that intercourse was like doing it with a sex toy scientifically engineered for maximum pleasure. The sex was amazing for both of us..."
We should all be so lucky to experience and fuck our ideal sex doll designed for MAX pleasure. You lucky dawg you.

"She later told me that was the hottest thing that had ever happened to her." I would concur with that. Would love to hear more of "these" type of stories rather than barrels, carbines, turbines, and so on. (oxford commas lightin' you up? )

I may have to borrow the "constant full boil," metaphor. Its a goodie.

New2Midlo replies on 10/6/2021 7:48 am:
Trust that I would love nothing more than to share further experiencing involving borderline consensual non-consent. But you've read my blog and know my sex life, since moving to KS has been abysmal; and that's being charitable. So, I'm not refilling the pipeline, so to speak. You throwing out Oxford commas only adds to my frustration.

If you haven't already read it, I suggest seeking out A Night With His Toy, on page 4. It's a 'best of' my experiences with my last sub, wound into one tale. She had only ever been with her premature ejaculator of a husband before coming to me, and I was a very bad man to her. Also noteworthy is The Lost Weekend, which is further back.

missthee 56F  
4511 posts
10/7/2021 10:02 am

My words matter more than whatever "body language" the other party claims to have understood.
I am more likely to go all the way with a first date if there is no alcohol involved at all.
Also, if I consider someone has imbibed more alcohol than I care for them to have imbibed I walk away, despite the attraction and my heightened arousal. I prefer to reconnect at a later date when it's just us.

New2Midlo replies on 10/7/2021 3:57 pm:
Everyone is different and I'm sure you're a lot of fun, whipping out your breathalyzer on dates.

Can we stop fucking fixating on the wine portion, people? Where it was involved, it was excellent, but also consumed in a much lower quantity than would be required to impair someone's judgment. FFS, move on.

missthee 56F  
4511 posts
10/8/2021 9:23 am

I apologize if you understood my feedback to be a commentary on your own experience. That was not my intention.
Truly, I was just answering the question posed, offering my own preferences from my own point of view.

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