All right, what's the deal?
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Posted:Feb 16, 2007 1:10 pm
Last Updated:Aug 15, 2012 12:55 pm
5963 Views
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I post a two-part blog entry detailing my lurid fourway in college between my then gf, her best friend, my buddy and myself, and between the two entries I don't get HALF the comments that my MMM threesome in high school receives.
Is guy-on-guy sex really that much more of a turn-on for my visitors than an mini-orgy? (Other than MM, obviously!)
Somebody enlighten me. 
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I want to fuck my boss
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Posted:Feb 7, 2007 7:43 pm
Last Updated:Nov 4, 2018 1:47 pm
6105 Views
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I know lots of people typically have this fantasy, but in my case it's complicated even by fantasy standards.
We started working together last year, having lunch around the same time, and developed a very respectful professional relationship. I had always found her classy and attractive but since she's married and has two grown and I have a girlfriend, I never felt any urge for something to develop.
Then just before summer she was promoted as head of our department. Nothing has changed-she's still a first rate class act, supremely organized, and morale is higher in our dept. than it's ever been since I started on the job. Everything is terrific.
Except for one day last September. We were all moving supplies and equipment around the office early one morning when she came by to ask if we needed anything. One of my colleagues began a lengthy conversation with the boss about some dreck that only she would be interested in and my boss, being the classy lady she is, listened politely and took down some notes in her book.
Due to the early morning hour and the warm days still holding on into fall, we were all getting a bit sweaty and I took a break from moving a desk to sit and down some Gatorade. Looking down the hall where my boss was talking to my co-worker, I nearly choked on my drink.
The morning sun bathed the hallway in pale streaks, and my boss was backlit against the window where the light was beaming through. She had worn a clingy but conservative sundress to work which became translucent in the sunbeams. I had a clear vision of her lacy bra and panty set against the silhouette of her impossibly beautiful body.
She had always been a fitness fanatic, always bringing her own nutritious meals, walking the treadmill, constantly carrying a gigantic water bottle, but even so I was amazed at the results. Her body was lithe, her limbs willowy, and following the convex arc between her incredibly round breasts atop her taut stomach set my brain afire! Her blonde hair refracted the light off her ivory skin and the effect reminded me of Botticelli's Venus.
This woman is fifty years old, and she has turned me into a fourteen year old boy.
It was a fleeting image as the light shifted suddenly, but the memory seared itself across my cerebellum. I soon found that I couldn't erase the picture of her standing there, unwittingly broadcasting her perfect form to the shrewd and the lucky.
Now everytime I see her at a meeting, walking through the office, going over forms, the image of her sleek carriage colors my view like a plastic overlay changing the tint of a photo. I picture her when I'm fucking my girlfriend. When I fantasize about other women, she invariably slips in and dominates.
I don't love her. I don't want her to divorce her husband. I don't want to dump my girlfriend.
I just want to fuck her unconscious. I want to put my mouth all over her, take her ripe melons into my mouth and devour them before I lick down her abdomen and suck on her clit until she soaks my face with her multiorgasm's residue.
I want to fuck her in every hole, multiple times, in every position. I want to spill my jizz down her throat, up her pussy, between her tits, and up her ass.
I want to sleep deeply with my face in her cleavage and her long legs wrapped around my hips, her calves rubbing languidly along my hamstrings while her perfectly manicured nails draw designs into my back.
I want to hear her squeal and scream my name, then beg me to come inside her.
I think I need to find a new job. 
Has anyone else ever had a situation like this, and how did you deal with it?
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Sex Education
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Posted:Feb 5, 2007 2:18 pm
Last Updated:Aug 13, 2020 8:30 pm
5929 Views
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As I pointed out in a previous blog, my mom had the "talk" with me when I was 11 and I couldn't stop laughing the whole time! In the prepubescent stage, listening to someone as they describe the sex act is absolutely hilarious.
Keeping this in mind, my buddies and I decided on the last day of elementary school, right after graduation, we would walk out of the building, stop, turn, face the doors of the institution that had been the bane of our existence since kindergarten, and yell at the top of our lungs:
"SCHOOL SUCKS!!!"
So the aforementioned day arrived, our last day of class in grammar school, and Frank and Mike and myself did as we promised. We yelled out as loud as we could and then spent the entire walk home congratulationg each other on our first protest of social institutions and their failings.
I was so pleased with myself that when my mother saw my face she immediately knew something was amiss and pried the info out of me. With a blend of both apprehension and pride, I told my mother what the three of us had done, even though I knew it had been extremely disrespectful.
My mother gasped when I told her, and her reaction puzzled me. She didn't become stern or begin a lecture-she was genuinely horrified! My bewilderment must have been apparent, because my mother then said to me in a low, hushed voice.
"You shouldn't say things like that." she warned. "Do you know what that phrase means?"
I rolled my eyes, stupefied. I mean, mothers are inherently uncool, but this was lame even by my mom's standards.
"Duh, it means that school sucks up everything worthless and stores it-y'know, like a vacuum cleaner?"
My mom blinked audibly, then continued in her hushed tone.
"No, what 'suck' refers to is..." Her voice lowered to a whisper as she leaned close. "...sucking on a penis!"
This revelation fluttered through my brain like a moth, looking for a steady neuron to alight on. Alas, it could not find one. I processed this bit of information as intensely as possible but could not get past one basic truth. So there could only be one obvious solution-
My mother was obviously teasing me! I started chuckling at my mother's lame attempt to be funny.
"No, it doesn't. That doesn't make any sense at all." The giggles started to bubble up until I searchd my mother's face and found that she was deadly serious.
"Yes, it does." she assured me. My jaw dropped.
"Are you crazy?" I knew my mother was now seriously nuts. "Why would anyone ever suck on a penis??!!??"
"Some people do that." came her calm response.
I was absolutely revolted. Shocked. Appalled. Grossed out, even. A million cootie shots and crossing all my fingers could never wash the stain of this image from my mind.
"Mom, that's disgusting."
"Some people like to do it."
"What people? Crazy people? Retards? Who" I was quite distressed by this point.
"Normal, healthy regular people-lots of them do it."
I finally went ballistic.
"That's frickin' disgusting!!! Why would anyone wanna suck on a penis?"
I finally had to confront her:
"DO YOU KNOW WHAT WE USE THAT FOR???!!! UGH!!!"
I shouted before I ran up to my room to play the loudest music I could in order to drum out the image.
Amazing how time changes your outlook on just about everything, doesn't it?
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Riding the Zodiac
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Posted:Feb 3, 2007 1:46 pm
Last Updated:Jun 30, 2007 1:33 am
6023 Views
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Got this from SensuousSalz's blog and since I absolutely REFUSE to take a chance of 12 years of bad luck, here goes:
So, what's your sign, baby?
Below are true descriptions of zodiac signs, with traits from a book written 35 years ago by an astrologist predictionist. Read your sign, then repost this in a new bulletin with your zodiac sign and label, or you'll get bad luck for the number of years stated in your sign description.
TAURUS: The
Aggressive. Freak in bed. Rare to find! Loves being in long relationships.
Likes to give a good fight for what they want. Extremely outgoing. Sexy as hell
Loves to help people in times of need. Outstanding kisser. Very funny. Awesome personality. Stubborn. Sexual as ......... Most caring person you will ever meet! One of a kind. Not one to fuck with. Are the most sexiest people on earth! 15 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
VIRGO: The Virgin
Dominant in relationships. Sexy. someone loves them right now. Freak in bed.
Always wants the last word. Caring. Smart,Intellectual. Attractive. Loud. Loyal. Easy to talk to. Hard to forget Love at first sight. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to please. The one and only. Ultimate sexiness. 7 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
SCORPIO: The sex addict
Can be mean. EXTREMELY sexy. Intelligent. Energetic. Predict future. Most erotic. (Freak in bed.) (GREAT kisser.) Always get what they want. Sexy. Attractive. Easy going. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. The sexiest
ever....Romantic. Caring. 4 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
LIBRA: The Lover
Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone They meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique sexiness. Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing n Bed..!!! Did I say Amazing in Bed? not the kind of person you wanna fuck with... u might end up crying... the most irresistible. 9 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
ARIES: The Liar
Outgoing. Lovable. Spontaneous. Not one to #### with. Erotic. Funny. Take you on trips to the moon in bed. Excellent kisser EXTREMELY sexy. Loves being in long relationships.=) Addictive. Loud. best in bed. 16 years of
bad luck if you do not repost.
AQUARIUS: Does it in the water
Trustworthy. Sexy. Great kisser. One of a kind. Loves being in long-term relationships. Extremely energetic. Unpredictable. Will exceed your expectations. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out. Amazing in bed, THE BEST LOVERS BETTER THAN EVERYONE! 2 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
GEMINI:. Does Twosomes
Nice. Love is one of a kind. Great listeners Very Good in bed. Lover not a fighter, but will still knock you the hell out. Trustworthy. Always happy. Loud. Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING. Loves to make out. Has a beautiful smile. Generous. Strong. ULTRA SEXY. THE MOST IRRESISTIBLE. 9 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
LEO:. The Lion in bed
Great talker. Sexy and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to have fun. Is really good at. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to earth.
Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative.
Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Good when found. 7 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
CANCER: The Cutie
MOST AMAZING KISSER. Very high ### appeal. Great in bed!!! Love is one of a kind. Very romantic. Most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely
creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Freak in bed. Spontaneous. Great telling stories. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out if it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to. 12 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
PISCES: The Piece of ass
Caring and kind. Smart. Center of attention. Too Sexy, DAMN IT. Very high sex appeal. Has the last word. The best to find, hardest to keep. Fun to be around. Freak in the sheets. Extremely weird but in a good way. Super good in bed. Good Sense of Humor!!! Thoughtful. A partner for life. Always gets what he or she wants. Loves to joke. Very popular. Silly, fun and sweet. 5
years of bad luck if you do not repost.
CAPRICORN: The passionate Lover
Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Predict future. Irresistible, awesome kisser. Loves being in long relationships. Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. BY FAR the BEST in BED. Very sexy. Coolest. Loves to own Gemini's in sports.
Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Loves to be your first. So you'll never forget. Smart. 24 years of bad luck if you do not repost.
SAGITTARIUS: The Sexy one
Spontaneous. Horny. Freak in Bed. High appeal. Rare to find. Great when found. Loves being in long relationships. The one. So much love to give. Not one to mess with. Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone They meet.
Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique sexiness.
Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing in Bed..!!! Did I say Amazing
in Bed? 4 years bad luck
Why do the Sagitarrians only get 4 years of bad luck? I think they should all give the rest of us oral sex if they're so amazing in bed!
Looking over this list, it dawned on me that I have never bedded a Libra, a Scorpio, or a Pisces, while I have slept with 4 Geminis, 2 Cancers, and 2 Aries.
If you sleep with every member of the Zodiac, does that make you more worldly or just a ? (Bi, I know your answer on this already!  )
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Finishing my beer, I left the can on the dresser...
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Posted:Jan 30, 2007 3:00 pm
Last Updated:Aug 10, 2014 8:33 am
6755 Views
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...and moved towards the bed, loosening my belt as I did so.
As I neared the edge, Sheila leaned forward and yanked down my jeans and underwear. I kicked off my shoes, pants, and briefs and pulled off my shirt. My half-hard whiskey-dick was still sleepy, so I concentrated on sucking Sheila's big, freckly jugs while she moaned and stroked my cock.
Every so often I peaked over to watch Jenny getting her cunt licked by Jim. My girlfriend was really getting into it and I felt a slight pang of jealousy, but since I had her best friend's tits in my mouth, I didn't really have a justifiable case!
Sheila's stroking began to wake up my tired dick, and pretty soon Willy was ready for another round. Scientists have actually proven that the more available sex partners a man has, the more readily he can get an erection.
I was a walking science project by this time-as my cock swelled up, I grabbed Sheila's ankles and pulled her legs apart like a chicken's wishbone. Her pussy lips were fatter and redder than my girlfriend's more delicate rose petals, and the thick, red briar patch encircling her box was soaked with her juice. Piloting my stiff rod against her mound, I let the head slide down until it parted her folds like Zorro cutting open a curtain.
Sheila lurched forward and my cock was engulfed in her cunt. I started to wriggle my hips to find the right angle but found myself unable to really plug her up. To this day I'm convinced that every pussy has a perfectly matching cock, because when I fucked Jenny we seemed tailor-made for humping each other.
Shifting back and forth, I tried to get traction in Sheila's voluminous pussy until I hit on the answer. Grabbing a throw pillow, I placed it under her ass and pushed her legs back to her tits. She whimpered in protest but didn't fight me because as soon as did, I felt her canal shift and I plunged balls deep into her. The unexpected move sent her eyeballs rolling upwards and she opened her mouth in a noiseless shriek. Now that I had the right angle, I seized her hips and began fucking her good and hard.
The unseasonably warm weather soon made its presence known as Sheila and I began to sweat from our vigorous coupling. As the alcohol evaporated through my pores, I became more focused and started to vary my strokes. I swiveled my hips at random, coming in high then pulling out low, and then finally started power-fucking Sheila.
The whole time Jenny was lying beside her, gasping out a few mini-orgasms as Jim tongued her into oblivion. When I really started to give it to Sheila good, I saw one of Jenny's slitted eyes glance open to watch us and an evil smile dashed across her face.
"Oh, God, you were right, Jen-he really is fast!" Sheila squeaked as I plugged her. Down beneath Jenny's legs, Jim was slurping away and I began wondering why he hadn't enjoyed her pussy yet when Sheila suddenly yelped like a bitch and dug her fingers into my arms as she finally gushed out the last of her climax and went limp below me.
"God, I can't take anymore..." she groaned and flopped back onto the mattress, her fat tits bouncing up and down in time with her rapid breathing. I politely pulled out and lay down between her and Jenny, whispering into Jenny's ear.
"Why don't you help out Jim, he's been working you over pretty good?" Jenny grinned, stretched out her limbs, then sighed and tapped Jim's shoulder.
"C'mere,Jimmy, I think you need some relief," she cooed. Sheila crawled up between my legs while Jenny got on all fours. I watched happily as my girlfriend wiggled her ass in front of my face while she commenced blowing my buddy. Looking over her shoulder, I realized that Jim was still having trouble fighting off the effects of the bottle and Jenny was using her pouty lips to offer encouragement.
Sheila ran her cleavage over my meat while I watched Jenny and Jim link up, then plunged down and took my cock all the way down her throat. It soon became an informal competition, both girls using every trick they knew to get their partners off. Unfortunately, they were fighting a losing battle against beer and exhaustion.
At last, Jim asked me if he could take Jenny into the spare bedroom where there would be less distractions. I nodded and my girlfriend took his hand to lead them across the hall-still naked! Although it was the dead of night by now, people were still mulling around downstairs and the thought of them being seen made me strangely turned on!
By this time, I was ready to get my rocks off and so pulled Sheila's mouth off my dick and turned her around on all fours. Pulling her towards the edge of the bed, I bent her over to take her doggy style, my favorite position.
Sheila looked over her shoulder at me. "Just so you know-my ass is one-way only!" Apparently Jenny had discussed our little anal escapade the last time we stayed at Sheila's house, and Sheila wanted to establish some ground rules.
"Don't worry, baby, I only do that with Jenny!" I reassured her as I angled my cock under her ass cheeks and slipped into pussy. Stroking in and out for a few minutes, I felt the tingling begin in my balls and the irrepressible urge start to overwhelm my crotch.
"I'm gonna come," I informed Sheila. Sheila pulled away so that my ironcast spike popped out of her.
"Come in my mouth, baby. I'm not on the Pill and I don't Jenny would like it if you knocked me up," she counseled before wolfing down my quivering meat. I couldn't argue with that logic, and as her moist lips clamped down on the base of my shaft, she tugged at it with her mouth and I splattered her throat with sperm. She deep-throated me like an old and when I finished convulsing, she propped me up against her shoulder and laid me down to rest.
"I'm going to clean up and wash the taste out of my mouth. You lie down and rest, sweetie." Sheila was nothing but a silhouette against the moonlight as she padded out the door and down the hall.
I dozed awhile, the sweat misting on my skin and a cool breeze whispering across it from the open window. Before I nodded off, it occurred to me that most of the neighborhood probably heard our group fuck-fest.
A little later, the door opened and I watched a female figure quietly shut it before approaching the bed. I knew it was Jenny-I'd recognize her ass anywhere. Creeping over to one side, she slipped naked under the covers and gave me a kiss.
"Did you have fun tonight, baby?" she said softly. I grunted affirmatively as she hugged me.
"How did it go with Jim?"
Jenny blew her bangs upwards in frustration. "I did everything I could to get him hard, and nothing worked. Finally, I just gave up."
As she snuggled against me, I secretly grinned that he hadn't banged her, selfish as it was.
"At least you lived out your fantasy of fucking Sheila," she chuckled. I sat upright.
"What are you talking about? I didn't wanna bang Sheila."
Jenny sat up next to me, stroking my shoulder. "Yes, you did. You told me weeks ago, after I confessed that I wanted to do Terry and Jim."
I slapped myself in the head. "No, not Sheila! I said Shelly! You know, the girl that Terry is banging."
Jenny's voice became grave. "You mean I let you fuck my best friend and you didn't even want to?"
"Don't get me wrong," I assured her. "I was more than happy to fuck her, but that wasn't my fantasy. I wanted us to seduce Terry and Shelly."
Jenny was dumbfounded and put her head in my lap, apparently feeling rather foolish. I intended to comfort her but feeling her soft skin against mine caused an unexpected reaction.
Jenny's head jerked upwards. "Are you hard again?!?"
I smiled devilishly. "You have that effect on me, baby."
"Well, here's where you make up for getting a freebie." Without waiting for a response, Jenny pushed down and straddled me with frightening intensity, jamming herself on me cock.
"Do us both a favor and don't talk." she hissed as she screwed herself on my dick.
I did as I was told, folding my arms under my head, watching my gorgeous girlfriend use me as a live dildo.
The whole time I was thinking about how to break the news to Terry the next time I saw him.
But that's another tale!
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Care to join a foursome?
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Posted:Jan 29, 2007 3:00 pm
Last Updated:Aug 31, 2010 5:48 am
6667 Views
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Those of you who have read my entry on Worst Breakup Ever...?will recall my girlfriend from my college days named Jenny.
Before she decided to rip out my heart, she and I had some of the most intense fuck and suck sessions that I've ever had. I was 19-young, dumb and full of cum-and I spilled my load in, on, and sometimes through her on an almost daily basis.
Eventually the topic of sexual fantasies arose, and she asked what I would like to do. We had acted out most of her exhibitionist, BD, and food fetish interests (once even getting caught by the cops while fucking doggy style in her car!) and she indulged me one wild summery night in May by letting me deflower her perfect ass! We had often discussed how many of our classmates and college friends turned us on or off, and who we would like to get naked with if given the chance.
Jenny confessed that she had often pictured herself fucking my buddy Jim, an transfer student who was few years older than us, and also wondered what if would be like to get fucked by the president of our college's one frat, a muscular and charismatic black guy name Terry. One of Terry's girls was a cute, smoky-voiced porcelain doll named Shelly, who had a face like a young Karen Allen and a body like a young Debbie Allen. I admitted that the thought of bedding Shelly put me in an altered state and we joked often about swapping with them, neither of us willing to call the other's bluff.
Fast forward a few weeks later to a party at the home of Jenny's friend Sheila, a brassy Irish redhead with quite a set of kegs who had the whole frat over along with our other college friends. I got totally plastered and Jenny was buzzed more than I'd ever seen her, and when she took me up to the master bedroom I wound up fucking her about five minutes before totally spending myself.
As I lay next to her, cooling down, we began talking about fantasies again. I mentioned that if she wanted, I'd send up one of my buddies to help finish up what I had started and was too wasted to complete. Since Terry had already left to go bang Shelly at another party, Jenny suggested sending Jim up.
This time I called her bluff.
I dressed and stumbled downstairs to the kitchen where Jim was pulling a beer out of the fridge.
"Hey, buddy," I slurred out my words. "How ya doin'?"
Jim raised an eyebrow."Just drinking a beer, bud. How are you doin'?"
"I'm fucking' awesome," I drooled. Jim laughed at my drunkenness but stopped short when I added: "You wanna fuck my girlfriend?"
Jim dropped the beer on the kitchen floor. Seeing it spill, he quickly snatched it back up and covered it to prevent overflow.
"Say that again..."
"Do YOU want to FUCK my girlfriend?"
Jim burst out laughing, almost hysterically, and took a swig. "This is a fucking joke, right?"
I shook my head. "She's upstairs in Sheila's parents' bedroom."
"And what am I supposed to do?" Jim replied incredulously.
I took the beer out of his hand. "Just knock on the door and tell it's you. I told her to expect you."
Jim opened his mouth to say something then decided just to investigate for himself. I finished his beer and worked my way through the party back upstairs to use the bathroom.
On my way out, I bumped into Sheila standing outside the bedroom door. Seeing me caused a double take as she looked from me to the door and back again.
"Is Jenny in there?" she asked. I nodded an affirmative grunt. Her face grew quizzical.
"But I heard a male voice in there with her...I thought it was you? Who's in there?"
"Jim." I said nonchalantly. Sheila's eyes bugged out of her face.
"And you're OK with this?"
I chuckled in my stupor. "I'd better be, it was my friggin' idea!"
Realizing that I had left my beer back in the bathroom, I turned to retrieve it and on my way back found Jim standing, still dressed, outside the bedroom, grinning so wide I thought his face would split.
"Y'know, you're fucking insane, don't you?"
I returned his shit-eating grin. He motioned towards the door.
"I think you should see something..."
Drinking my beer, I entered the darkened room and found Jenny and Sheila both under the covers, their clothes piled at the foot of the bed. I wandered over, smiling, and Jenny pulled me close to kiss me.
"How would you like all your fantasies to come true tonight, baby?" she murmured.
Well, what would your response be?
Sitting myself in a corner, I sipped my beer as Jim returned, closing the door behind him. He glanced at his watch, then looked at me foolishly.
"Why the hell am I looking at my watch? I have no use for time right now!" With that, he flung it across the room and looked over at me.
"And what the hell are you doing, bud?"
"I'm just enjoying the show," I said, raising my beer before taking a big swig.
Jim lost interest in anything I had to say when the girls beckoned him onto the bed. Kicking off his sneakers, he got between them and pulled the covers back. The two of them lay there giggling hysterically, but their laughing soon turned to moaning when Jim stuck his face down Sheila's twat and slid his hand up Jenny's thighs.
I have to give Jim credit because pleasuring two women at the same time with equal attention is not as easy as it looks in pornos. Sheila was writhing as Jim ate her out, pushing the back of his head so hard that I thought he might suffocate. Jenny was pushing back against his vibrating hand, fucking herself against his two fingers while his thumb diddled her clit. When Sheila reached over to tweak Jenny's nipple, my girlfriend went over the edge and I could tell she was having a multi!
Sheila hit the roof soon after and pushed Jim's head away to avoid overstimulating herself. The two girls then started pulling Jim's clothes off and he began focusing on my woman. He took one of Jenny's apple-sized tits in his mouth and began sucking it while his hands roamed in and out of her crotch.
Sheila recovered, her huge, freckly tits glistening with sweat, and watched Jim work over my girl for a few moments. Swinging her gaze my way, she smiled devilishly and crooked a finger my way, parting her legs invitingly.
Finishing my beer, I left the can on the dresser and moved towards the bed, loosening my belt as I did so....
Anybody want to know how the rest of the night turned out? 
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Snow
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Posted:Jan 20, 2007 9:53 am
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2016 2:34 pm
5882 Views
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It's been an unseasonably warm winter here in the Northeast so far, and though I am a summer baby who hates to be cold and wet for any length of time, I'm sentimental enough to have appreciated a white Christmas if not a chilly New Year. Considering that I'm still killing flies in mid-January, a shocking Arctic blast would be welcome right about now.
Cool weather brings cooler tempers, and after the past semester at school has wrought office politics grown to soap operatic heights, with post-holiday bills creeping, indifferent teenagers who think the midterms next week will pass themselves...I have one last nerve left, and EVERYTHING is getting on it.
I'm cranky and irritable as I drive to my volunteer work. I haven't been there in two months because of the aforementioned melodrama, and I'm not sure that my mood bodes well for helping autistic and misdeveloped youngsters for two hours. I put on my game face but all the other volunteers know something is smoldering inside and leave me to watch James.
James is a sad-eyed, dark haired, conspicuously quiet , even for an autistic , one of a pair of Irish lads who suffer from the same disorder (and yes, their mother is a saint!)
Most of our time together he plays with cars and trucks, incorporating them into whatever wonderland exists in his vault-like mind, or he takes Scrabble letters and spells out impossibly complex words that he's seen on DVDs: Cartoon Network Presents, Paramount Studios, Walt Disney Feature Presentation. He restricts verbal communication to one word phrases, but perks up when I spell words for him with the tiles. I spell his name, his brother's name, then my name. This last one he looks up and wrinkles his brows at me. I point to my name tag and he says my name monotonously.
After a slice of pizza, we go to the gym for some exercise. We bounce a ball around before he races around the gym's perimeter on the tricycle. I watch with a close eye to make sure he doesn't bang into the stage again (dammit, too late-"JAMES-U turn, buddy!" ) while talking with some of the women who run the volunteer program. They ask me about school and work, and recanting all the needless hassle of a teacher's life, the constant increase in tuition for grad school, my at risk students destined to fail state exams-I feel the dark cloud billow over me once again, and wish for a winter that would actually reflect my mood rather than cause it!!
Searching for James, I see him motionless, sitting on the trike, peering upwards through the big Plexiglas windows of the gym. I walk over to see what has so captivated him and look over his shoulder through the windowpanes. The gym overlooks a courtyard entrance so that all you can see is a copse of bare-branched ash trees lined across a concrete wall. Nothing inspiring or impressive, usually.
Then I see the flurries.
Dancing in the glow of the outside lights, scattering across the reedy limbs of the ash trees, they fall like a swarm of flattened insects, blown about by the gasping crosswinds. Each one unique, individual, all part of the same storm, riding the currents of Time to their inexorable end. Each one reflects the light in its own way and the fluctuating spaces between each of them creates a black and white kaleidoscope that catches the eye and bathes the mind in silence.
It's a brief moment-the flakes will not stick, the wind will tyrannize them into raindrops by morning, and no one has seen them except myself and this quiet autistic boy who speaks in one word sentences.
I glance down at him and he's kneeling on the ledge, still watching intently.
"James, do you know what that is?" I ask. He turns and looks me in the eye.
"Snow." As he says it, his nose wrinkles up and he smiles.
I think of the Frost poem that I taught my freshmen:
"The way a crow
Shook down on me
the dust of snow
from a hemlock tree
Has given my heart
a change of mood
and saved some part
of a day I had rued."
I smile back at James and nod, starting to chuckle.
"Snow."
We both watch the flurries dissipate, waiting for his mother to pick him up.
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Worst Breakup Ever...Part 2
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Posted:Jan 19, 2007 1:06 pm
Last Updated:Jun 15, 2007 7:50 pm
5890 Views
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I wrote in the previous entry about the worst breakup I ever had but in that case it was one where I got dumped. Later on I was in a situation that merited a nasty breakup which I handled quite differently.
I had met her at work, and while the attraction was instantly there, she was seeing a guy and I was playing the field, and initially we decided that working in the same department would lead to "shitting where you eat."
One night, though, I was driving her back to the office after we all had been to happy hour and we wound up fooling around in my car. No penetration-she was a good Catholic girl-but a LOt of heavy petting. We ended up dating and I really started falling for her. She dropped her beau and we became an item. The whole time, though, we never went beyond third base and I remained patient until she was ready because I wanted to be a gentleman, knowing what a horn-I had been with my last real girlfriend.
Finally, we decided to consummate our relationship after 6 months! I rented a room at a nice hotel, took her out for dinner and a movie, then returned to our quarters after a lovely evening where we began to make out. We took our time, savoring every stroke, tongues lashing out, two naked bodies writhing in each other's sweat. I performed oral on her for the first time in her life and sent her to the moon! After fingering her to keep her moist, I pulled her legs over my shoulders and prepared to enter her. Before I could thrust forward, though, she suddenly pushed me away.
"I can't," she told me, unable to look me in the eyes.
"Why not?" I responded. What could possibly be wrong? Did she have an STD? Was she sick? Did Catholic guilt rear its ugly head? All of these I could live with, and it wouldn't have changed my feelings for her.
She met my gaze: "I'm still in love with my ex-boyfriend..."
The look in her eyes told me that she knew I was hurt, and she searched my face for signs of forgiveness or anger or humiliation but she found none-a switch clicked off in my head and I turned around and put my clothes back on.
"Where are you going?" she said. "I felt that I had to be honest. Are you mad? Do you hate me? I'm so, so, sorry...!!" (BiCurious knows how I feel about apologies!)
I said nothing, just walked towards the bed, past her, and left two $20 bills on the night table.
She looked at the money then back at me.
"What is that for?"
"Cab fare." I didn't even face her as I slammed the door and went down to check myself out.
Afterwards, I drove to a high-class strip joint and spent the money I had saved for her birthday gift on beer and fake breasts! 
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Worst Breakup Ever...?
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Posted:Jan 16, 2007 3:06 pm
Last Updated:Aug 15, 2012 12:41 pm
6269 Views
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I was responding to a friend's blog (Bi, you know who you are, cowgirl!  ) regarding relationships, when I found myself thinking back to an old girlfriend from when I was 20. She was absolutely stunning-long, curly blonde hair, piercing blue eyes, a face like Kim Basinger, northern Italian girl from Queens with a body that strippers get surgery to achieve.
Sexually, it was the greatest time of my life-I played the bad boy heavy metal guitar player from the wrong side of town, she was the sweet Catholic school girl next door-she pulled out my romantic side, I developed her voracious sexual appetite! Our sex sessions would last hours, just rutting over and over like a species that dies after sex! I tried everything with her-I came in her mouth, her pussy, her hand, I deflowered her ass and-yep-came in that too! The culmination of our Dionysian lust came at a summer barbecue when we had a four-way with her best friend and my best friend. It was her first bisexual experience and I think she spent a good deal of her twenties dealing the fallout.
Of course, all good things come to an end, and ours was particularly nasty. I wasn't the most respectful or considerate of boyfriends, like most young men, and she began seeing an older guy on the side. The whole affair unraveled in one fell swoop-The day before the Fourth of July, I had a blowout on the highway on the way to band practice for a party we were playing the next day and had an accident. I was unharmed but my car was banged up and needed to be towed. I hiked up the shoulder to a gas station to call a tow truck, then called my girlfriend to tell her what happened. I could tell from the tone of her voice that something was up and she finally blurted out that she was breaking up with me! Over the phone, she tells me that she doesn't want to go out with me anymore!!!
I didn't even wait for the tow truck-I put the donut on my mangled Chevy and drove it to her workplace to confront her. We argued in the parking lot for what seemed like hours until it finally sank in, and I drove home in a daze. I drank a twelve pack and passed out.
The worst part? The party I was supposed to play at the next day was mine-she jilted me over the phone, the day before a national holiday AND my birthday, after I was in a car accident.
Needless to say, I didn't date again for four years.
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Happy New Year!
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Posted:Dec 31, 2006 12:12 pm
Last Updated:Jan 22, 2007 1:02 pm
6371 Views
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In case I don't get to say it to all my friends in blog-land, hope you and yours have a terrific New Year: health, happiness, and harmony to you and all your loved ones!!!
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I've had it!!!
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Posted:Dec 29, 2006 2:59 pm
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2016 2:34 pm
6375 Views
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After waiting for Senior Sizzle to fix my profile so that there aren't two of them on the site and trying to track down other people who seem to be using my pics and sometimes a similar screen name(!)-and giving me a bad name in the process-I'm turning off my profile and just blogging from now on.
Those few who are reading my blog, thanks, we'll continue to chat. Everyone else knows where to go.
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To link to this blog (Canice70) use [blog Canice70] in your messages.
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