LMAO..
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Posted:Jan 9, 2018 8:38 am
Last Updated:May 24, 2024 8:29 am
278 Views
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A family is at the dinner table. The asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?”
The father, surprised, answers, “Well, , a woman goes through three phases. In her
20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like
pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the asks.
“Yes. You see them and they make you cry.” This infuriated his wife and .
The asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says,
“Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard.
In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable.
After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the asks.
“Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.”
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Another joke..
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Posted:Jan 9, 2018 8:34 am
Last Updated:Apr 11, 2018 9:27 pm
339 Views
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One night 2 aliens landed their space ship next to a gas station. There was a smart alien and a badass alien.
They both went up to the gas pump and the badass alien looked at the pump and said "Take me to your leader!"
Of course the gas pump said nothing.
The smart alien says "I don't think that is a good idea."
The badass alien looks to the pump again and demands to be taken to the leader.
The smart alien says "Really that's not a good idea"
Losing his patience, the badass alien pulls his death ray and blows the gas station to pieces.
Burnt and bruised, the badass alien looks to the smart alien and asks "How did you know that wasn't a good idea?"
Smart alien replies "Anybody that can throw their dick over their shoulder, has got to be a bad mother fucker!!!"
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