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Blogs > Sippmann > My travels to a new beginning

Anger at Christmas  

Sippmann 75M
2 posts
12/25/2020 11:24 pm

Last Read:
12/27/2020 6:41 am
Anger at Christmas

Today is Christmas and I just returned from taking my home. We had a nice dinner and present exchange. There were some tense moments between my wife and I and also between my wife and our .

Because of the tension I am angry, Yes, I am damn angry that I am losing and in many ways have already lost my wife of 49 years .

I think I may have mentioned that my wife is bi-polar. I knew that she had some mental health issues when we married, but still we married. Sex to my wife was an obligation, something to be endured, unless she was in one of those rare manic states were she wanted and enjoyed sex. After our was born and we survived two miscarriages and finally a hysterectomy she began losing complete interest in sex and started to sleep on the couch and when our moved out on her own she moved into her bedroom.

During the past couple of years she has been becoming increasingly hard to live with. She is becoming more like her mother every day, forgetting, argumentative and combative. Her mom died with dementia. I feel that my wife is also developing dementia.

We got into a fight the other night and I finally told her that I was curious and I am looking for either men or women to have an affair with. She told me she knew that something was afoot and that she supports me in this journey, wherever it takes me, even if it is with another woman. She is not crazy about the idea of a woman but she said that she would support me as much as she can.

The next morning she had forgotten most of what we had fought about and the fact that I may be a Bisexual. If you think I am angry, your damn right I am angry. Angry that my wife is going further from me. Angry that I will at some point I must place her in a place where she can be cared for better.

Recently on this site I got angry with a woman because she would not communicate in more than two word replies, that were routinely snarky, nasty, snide or down right rude. She got angry, to be expected, and wanted to know why I was so angry? I told her about the issues above. Her comment was "You have an anger problem and you need help". Really? There was no empathy or compassion whatsoever. What kind of woman or person does that?

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