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| Blogs > justaguyinalaska > Big World, Short Day |
In Praise of: AFF Soul-Mates
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In Praise of: AFF Soul-Mates My heart's calculatin' My true love will be waitin' Be waitin' at the end of my ride Move 'em on, head 'em up Head 'em up, move 'em on Move 'em on, head 'em up Rawhide If there is anything in this community that is reliable, it is regular notifications from beautiful women from all over the world who have determined after- no doubt- exhaustive research (no mean feat when you are a Standard Member) that I may be the *one* for them. Through such wondrous outreach, I am sure that- over time- every in this community has acquired incontrovertible evidence that he is *god's gift women*. What a blessing it is have a place in Senior Sizzle's *All-Star Trophy Cabinet*! Not look a gift- in the mouth, but I do feel the need impose a bit of order on my unbridled popularity. For your consideration, I offer these "New Rules" for candidate *Soul Mates*: 1. A Little Short of 1,000 Words Although the single picture posted with your profile is seductive, if you are trolling (oops, I mean "searching") for a soul-mate, you have provide at least . It may complicate your culling of obscure websites for fake pictures, but I am absolutely worth the effort. 2. Perhaps It Does Take a Village If you truly live in a town in Iowa with population 1,3 and have a face that is assuredly the most attractive thing within 0 miles (outside of the all-you can eat Sunday pancake feeds at the Legion Hall), consider assembling a security detail. With a population of 25 million self-identified sex addicts, you are shit--a-fly for more than a few Senior Sizzle stalkers, especially now that gasoline is so cheap. 3. Many-Splendored Penises If you are really in search of "true love" in an "honest, monogamous" relationship, you need exercise some discretion and work towards a Friends Network is more than an album of dick-pix. 4. International Rates Apply As much as I love globe-trotting, I am not going to fly to Ghana to meet you. Can you at least pretend to be within 35 digits of my zip code? 5. Shelter-In-Everywhere My thrill with your devotions would endure a bit longer if you could linger in the same city for more than 1 hour. When you suddenly beam down into my "Members Near [Me]" feed, it's a little awkward when I read in your "My Activities" log that one hour ago your location was 1,973 miles away. 6. Breeding Contempt I appreciate that my faceless profile pic oozes seductive masculine sexuality. But I like to believe that it only gets better when you get to know me. So, if you are going to "Hotlist" me, at least ping me for a bit more of my profile (or at least a link to my "Courtview" page). To all my soul-mates out there: thank you for your tireless efforts to make me feel *special*. Peace out. |
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To Senior Sizzle management: you can cease-and-desist swarming me with your boiler-room *comfort girls*. Our community is blessed with an abundance of fascinating and authentic people with whom I enjoy spending *virtual time*. When it comes time, I promise to renew my Gold Membership.
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"Comfort girls" I like that phrase - it explains their appearance on my profile "liking" my current picture. Mine must be newbie fembots, learning their trade. Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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Great blog my friend....very intuitave... Visit my [blogonelastchan00] to enter my[post4439715]
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Ha, those location hoppers will make your head spin, won't they? I used to get messages from a guy in Alabama who claimed he was 'moving to your area soon'. He was not at all happy when he repeat messaged me and I replied, "Yeah you said that a year ago. I don't think that word 'soon' means what you think it means."   
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As you can tell, women do get the occasional "I'm in your area, but just not at the moment" message. There are also more than a few male profile photos which have been lifted from modelling catalogues. Oddly enough, though, these peripatetic and too good to be true gentlemen seem to prefer more vanilla sites. Does that indicate Senior Sizzle women are considered too canny?
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At some point when I was looking at the local (to me) members, I noticed a lot of these fake profiles were interacting (with likes and friend requests) with other local fake profiles. It felt so surreal, that there was another reality here, where the bots/catfishers were busy at communicating with other bots/catfishers. It's become a form of Virtual Reality, where we as "real" "material" members are just bugs in the ecosystem. If there is an alien civilization out there with a higher IQ than us, they must be scratching their heads (or whatever other body part hosts their central nervous system) at all the time and effort put into these fake profiles.
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