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Was My "Curiosity" Actually Bait For My "Self", part 2  

tomboytgirl68 55T
23 posts
1/5/2022 11:58 pm
Was My "Curiosity" Actually Bait For My "Self", part 2


And so; why "Kitty"? Well, the jury is still out on this as to the full extent of this charade; thus, so is my indictment. Presently, however, I do know it will fall within the parameters of "cute as a Kitten" plus gradually morph into a "Cat", and all the inferences to include what we shall discover, I'm afraid. I only have a couple days more visiting; I doubt if I shall leave any of my trust here with "Kitty".

As to recently, and my narration lately being somewhat disjointed ... or "back to the future", so to speak ... I left for my trip to Chicago "over the Holidays" before Thanksgiving. However, I began describing our arrival being on Xmas Eve eve. So, what I doing, etc from prior to Thanksgiving till then?

Well, my trip to Victor's not to Chicago but thru and around Chicago about an hour to Romeoville, IL. I asked, no ... I told not to discuss, blog or mention anything about that portion of the trip ... nothing. If I said anything, some "opportunities" mentioned at the onset that I might to pursue would be nullified, period.

And now, just recently, I have been advised by he, she, or "they", have rescinded the condition of silence. Moreover, I have been encouraged to "tell" as much as I to about all aspects of it ... all my feelings and reactions are welcome, both, positive and/or negative ... my only guidance to be "sincerity".

The only explanation I have received for the initial secrecy mandate and then this dramatic reversal is so insulting ... just simply a test to see if "I could be trusted to keep a secret"! There were some controversial areas, but nothing that could not be justified and then there their threat to take it all away. If nothing else, why would I say anything at all until I made up my mind?

So now is my first comment, reaction, feeling about their explanation to me ... and remember all(?) have endorsed and welcome my candor ... the explanation for this silence thingy offered to me is simply "BS". I do understand that some of my first visit period, like "elements of DID" I have known since 7th grade ... but they called it "MPD" back then and advised that I predisposed towards some behavior manifested by<b> desires </font></b>& needs not usually associated with my proposed Gender Identity ... so no surprise! ... or perhaps only my surprise that methods involving diagnosis has not changed that much.

So, from now on, let's call everything for what it is, or, complete disclosure on your part also ... that all can see everything ... what do you have to lose? ... I have nothing to lose; read my blog; it has given me the gift to not be negative or embarrassed, etc ... to be honest and open about myself and others have raised their hands now and then also ...

I think knowing ourselves and more than just "accepting" ... but rather liking ... celebrating ourselves for who and what we are ... when we learn we can find and give pleasure thru self-actualization of our self instead of living a pseudo superficial life dictated by the bias and prejudices of social ignorance.

This is getting to long now but yes, in the next part I will tell about that part of my trip and my reasons for my answers. No, it is not particularly sensually salacious stuff, etc. but more like being honest with it all together and my decisions as if it wasn't "me", it wouldn't work anyway. And again, then in 20 years or so ... I will know the answers to "what in the hell I thinking to do whatever". lol.
...xox Kaycee.

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