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Myself, so very bare and in your lap ... whisper # 18, Being "watched" is requisite torment..  

tomboytgirl68 55T
23 posts
7/22/2021 10:14 pm
Myself, so very bare and in your lap ... whisper # 18, Being "watched" is requisite torment..


"So you "Men" now that I'm figuratively in your laps ... feel free to put your hands wherever you please but also listen and learn so you can forever just nod, knowingly all about this from our point of view ... or as intrinsically not being a member of your tribe, but being sexually active, at least from my perspective ... to consider ... lol

Innately, by definition, I am latently exhibitionistic; and I think that most, either male or female who do not subscribe toward the "macho" masculine end of the "gender Identity" spectrum are inherently, exhibitionistic.

But, to begin ... regardless of being male or female or your feminine side vs your masculine side ... put very crudely I once read it all defined as with consideration to our social population of age 18 and above of sexually active people ... the bottom line might well be described to be made up of figuratively potentially "Penetrators/Inseminators" or potentially "Penetrated/Inseminated" or individuals figuratively "Predators" or figuratively "Prey" or "Takers" or "Givers". The Predators hunt the Prey and the Prey attract the Predators, thus an efficient, natural perpetuation of the species. Plus, of course, the rest of us who approach either most of the Predator or Prey characteristics but for some reasons have some degree of deviations due to some obscure life experiences. And this is the essence of my basic premise.

Now, given the above and specific to me ... I think I know which tribe I belong to and it is not the "Preditors". Therefore, the basis of my sexual activity, or what I am most comfortable with is to implicitly "attract", to give to a taker, etc. or being "male" in some respects, some would consider me a "Sissy", or "Shemale" or "Chick with a Dick", or "Tranny" or "T-Girl"or "Transgendered Female"... or simply Girl with something special. And for the record, no, I am not so uptight to take offense to any of these names or labels.

Anyway, with my natural inclinations, as most "Girls", I do tend to primp and preen, pamper myself with feeling soft and smooth almost all over, enjoy body lotions and fragrances and realize the magic of tasteful makeup. And in a potential sexual situation I do choose to wear outfits or combinations that flatter and leave some areas bare for display and the suggestion of even more delights with myself being totally unveiled ... a flaunting to ... you know .. to stimulate ... no, more to provoke ... at the least, those thoughts within him for me ... those thoughts that are selfish but natural ... some form of carnal lust that has awakened some deliciously decadent<b> desires </font></b>that he then feels I can satisfy and after all, knowing all the time and effort we put into attracting ... he has every right to make the assumption that he is going to get lucky, etc.

Putting all this together, I know I put in time and effort to "look appealing". I really do not try to "present" as a girl/woman per se. But I do try to "present" as attractive "prey" to actualize myself and realize my needs and<b> desires. </font></b>I realize that the difference there is subtle: but put another way, my motive is to maintain my needs and<b> desires </font></b>as I naturally feel and "coincidentally" that is also what "girls/women" do also and what outfits, etc. are designed for them to wear are available and I use also. Men respond better to me if they discover that I am wearing panties under my jeans.

Because of all this that I have thought about, when I see "that look" ... I know what they are thinking and paradoxically, I usually feel some degree of discomfort from being self-conscious to becoming irrationally embarrassed, inhibited or a little nauseous. If the situation allows him to continue to "watch me" and that goes to a leering at me ... I actually can feel violated by his eyes. I honestly do not enjoy being watched at all but ... at the same time, it turns me on also. So I do not get to enjoy it ... it is like a social curse, an essential ordeal that those like me have to endure toward satisfying our<b> desires </font></b>and validating our sexual appeal.

It is requisite and exquisite torment for us that we have to suffer through to get to the point of either vacating the scene or feeling their hand down our jeans and into our panties. We do not have a choice except to either be ourselves and own our identity or give up and become some pathetic, imposture trying to fool ourselves. This sounds so dismal and I don't mean it to be ... it is what it is and I think everyone has their problems, etc. My personal solution that seems to work for me is to just try to be myself.
... xox Kaycee.

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