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BDSM rituals and rule-bound relationships
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BDSM rituals and rule-bound relationships BDSM rituals and rule-bound relationships Bondage is an intellectual or spiritual knowledge like practice claiming to require special knowledge unavailable to non- practitioners. Likewise, I have little use for long lists of legalized rules with itemized consequences. All too often the excess in rituals seem to become ends within themselves rather than the means to some higher end. Anyone who has dealt intimately with a woman over time knows that, although not always overjoyed at the prospects of unceremoniously losing their knickers to a thoroughly provoked mate, women do not run from a well-deserved accompaniment. So, what do women often do? Test a man's resolve? Naturally! Refuse to cooperate? It happens. Protest? Not unheard of. Demand to interfere? Occasionally – especially if a man uses his hand. Actually run? No – not if she trusts the man. Mad because she got spanked? Sometimes. Wants a divorce simply because she was spanked by her husband? Not that I have seen. (In divorce there is something else going on.) The<b> chains </font></b>that bind are in a woman's heart. Often there is a certain no-nonsense tone of voice or that look which women respect. Although few women are explicit in their requirements, most expect men to take charge and eventually come to despise the man in their lives when it does not happen. Much like the Apostle Paul – who received almost two hundred lashes from his irate former comrades and, still, never condemned whipping – many women intuitively understand that merely preserving a pristine backside and unflappable composure solves nothing when more important things fall apart during the shortsighted self-serving conservation effort. To be sure, couples discover – sometimes even stumble – onto the seemingly magical transformation in their relationship through a variety of means. It might be a logical conclusion or the result of sheer desperation. Others find it through erotic play. Perhaps some discover it through BDSM rituals. Regardless of the path, domestic discipline comes about when couples realize that this needs to happen in order to release the tension and restore the harmony within the marriage. It is part of a quality or attribute that is difficult to describe or express that happens between a man and a woman and that is beyond the ability to language to easily explain. Although the analysis may seem judgmental it is not that BDSM is necessarily wrong or even misguided. Some couples may even need the formalized structure that BDSM provides as training wheels for an upright relationship. Yet, as with a myriad of rules and a laundry list of consequences, the rigid formalism seems to lack a facility that is not quite grasped. In BDSM, there is too much emphasis on ceremony and not enough attention is paid to substance.  |
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