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Blogs > trixietrixster > trixie's tales ... :)

Dear Former Warden:  

trixietrixster 56F  
3298 posts
6/29/2020 6:59 pm
Dear Former Warden:
You spoon fed my entire essence pure poison 24/7 thru your words and actions. Little by little, cutting me off from everyone and everything. Your consistent mental assault tearing me to shreds, dying more as the seconds went by. My want to live dwindling to the point where I just wanted it to be over – I was basically dead already. In the same thought, my brain told me to fight, not to allow you the satisfaction of watching me struggle to take a breath ...

16 months in your “prison” ALMOST broke me. I believed all you said … how I was this and that … how I’d never make it without you … how I now had no support system so where would I go. No job, no money … and so many other harmful things …

Despite your brainwashing, somewhere deep inside me, I knew I had value. Like Hide & Seek, you hid my worthiness. You changed up spots - trying to confuse me – making me think I was going crazy. Every now and then, I'd find it, keeping a small part of me intact. You never thought I’d have the intestinal fortitude to break free – neither did I …

The grieving state of you has passed. I know that mite sound<b> weird </font></b>as why would one feel sadness in leaving an unhealthy relationship. It’s hard to explain … guess it’s one of those things that unless you’ve been there …

Anger mode … prompting my quote for today. Working thru it, as I won’t allow this emotion to fester, to breed … YOU aren’t worth the energy, worth the time. You aren’t worth space in my head … not only are you late with your payment … you are several months in arrears. So, this is it … that piece of paper on the door … an eviction notice … you will vacant the premises. And, due to being an Empath, one of my traits that disgusted you, I won’t be following up for unpaid funds … you aren’t worth another ounce of ANYTHING …

The luv I have for myself far outweighs the anger I feel towards you … so, ya, you are officially dismissed … 😊



In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...
lindoboy100 61M
23969 posts
6/30/2020 4:48 am

 Such a brave thing to do McT, I am in awe of your inner strength!


Tmptrzz 61F  
107039 posts
6/30/2020 9:54 am

 Very well said my friend good for you, now you can move on with your life and enjoy the many wonderful adventures that await you. I hope your Tuesday is filled with many thrills..Huggles..
Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on..


sexyldy1000 68F  
9607 posts
6/30/2020 12:46 pm

 Your words really struck a chord with me. I was in a similar situation many years ago. It changed me forever and is something I will never forgot. Best wishes as you forge your new path.


trixietrixster 56F  
3125 posts
6/30/2020 4:15 pm
    Quoting lindoboy100:
    Such a brave thing to do McT, I am in awe of your inner strength!
@lindo - the trait of courage and strength ... apparently, I had more than I thought, as most do. It was down to the old adage "it's do or die", and I've still got much to accomplish before taking my last breath. Thank you ever so much ... *huggles*
In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


trixietrixster 56F  
3125 posts
6/30/2020 4:32 pm
    Quoting Tmptrzz:
    Very well said my friend good for you, now you can move on with your life and enjoy the many wonderful adventures that await you. I hope your Tuesday is filled with many thrills..Huggles..
Tmp - yes, my dear friend! Moving onto bigger and better - new memories - new journeys. Beautiful day - hope yours was also! *huggles*
In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


trixietrixster 56F  
3125 posts
6/30/2020 5:12 pm
    Quoting  :
12F - totally appreciate your kind thoughts, thank you for stopping by! Only forward - back is NOT an option. SELF-LUV ... finding more of that as each day passes ...
In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


trixietrixster 56F  
3125 posts
6/30/2020 6:08 pm
    Quoting sexyldy1000:
    Your words really struck a chord with me. I was in a similar situation many years ago. It changed me forever and is something I will never forgot. Best wishes as you forge your new path.
sexy - I'm truly sorry that you had to deal with something like this, that anyone had or, or has to. Changed forever - absolutely. I lost a lot in the time I was "missing". Some of the relationships I'm attempting to rebuild are beyond repair (based on the other person). I will continue to remain hopeful that one day it will happen. In the meantime, I am focused on those who didn't give up on me. Thank you ever so kindly for posting. And, altho I don't know you even in the slightest, I hope you will accept my huggles ...
In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...


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