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My Visit To The Cemetary ...
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My Visit To The Cemetary ... Today, I visited my mom for the first time since she died in my arms last Turkey Day. It was one of my top priorities to do before I have to get more poison cut out of my body in a few weeks. I needed to talk to her - just in case something were to happen ... just in case I didn't come back from "the other side" ... This morning my aunt was supposed to meet me at the cemetery. Was a little pissed - she cancelled last minute. Headed to the beach. Over it now ... Anywho, as difficult as I knew it was going to be, I made the conscious decision to do this by myself. At first. Then, I thought maybe not. After texting with one of my D/s sisters for support, . Of course, I got a little lost, GPS and all. On the way, all these thoughts went thru my mind, things I wanted to tell my mom ... I get to the crypts, park, remind myself to breathe. As I walked to the top of the steps, all the memories of her funeral hit me. Tears - sad tears. How everyone gathered that day last November to see her body laid to rest - see her spirit leave and fly upward. One of my most surreal things ever for me. Was somewhat eerily creepy walking down those steps into a wall of physical resting places. It took me a bit to find her. Once I did, I sat down, looked up at her, smiled. She was in a better place - no more suffering. And, she was now with her . This is something she has wanted for a long time. Tho, on the subject of my brother, eh ... I shared with her how my hubby got a raise at work. That my D/s Mommy and hubby are still happily involved. So blessed was I - they got along so well and bonder while my mom lived here. She accepted my lifestyle, my D/s family and friends. My sometimes stubborn behavior - a trait which I inherited from her. Told her bout my upcoming surgery. It always made her sad when they had to cut me open. "Mom - Vicodin ..." is what I would say. I would tell her it was more cause of the scars. She would say that it's not like I am 30! As if I needed that little reminder!!! Shared some of my horrid dating stories with her . Now my doggie now sleeps in the bathroom, senses my mom there, as she never got to say bye to her. How my doggie now eats eggs and rice every day for breakfast - chicken and rice every nite for dinner. It was very cathartic for me. And, well, I just rambled, eh ... When I got back to my car, I noticed the bugs had decided to feast on my body for a snack - UGH! Didn't even realize this. Her body lies at rest - her spirit enjoy total freedom - total happiness. Free from the trappings of a physical shell ... So decided that I was going to see my maternal grandparents while I was there. That was a little hard for my sense of navigation. Probably better off, as my brother is buried there. Tonicness, tho, I digress ... I am very much a spiritual creature, as opposed to religious. Those who leave us only do so in the physical form. Their spirit is released - able to see anything - do anything - complete freedom. No sickness, no pain ... My mom was a strong woman. Today, she gave me the strength to be strong ...   In Luv, Lite, Laffter ... |
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I visit my mom frequently (&dad) at the cemetary. I believe they see us and appreciate the visit. Glad you found strength there. I do also. I will also be thinking of you in your coming ordeal
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 my sweet friend, I know that she was listening to you as you talked to her and I am sure she misses you as much as you miss her..Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on.. 
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Amen In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...
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I visit my mom frequently (&dad) at the cemetary. I believe they see us and appreciate the visit. Glad you found strength there. I do also. I will also be thinking of you in your coming ordeal In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...
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my sweet friend, I know that she was listening to you as you talked to her and I am sure she misses you as much as you miss her..In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...
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