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Blogs > trixietrixster > trixie's tales ... :)

How The "Me" That I Now Am Came To Be ... :)  

trixietrixster 56F  
3298 posts
8/19/2015 4:33 am
How The "Me" That I Now Am Came To Be ... :)
After going thru several life changing experiences at bout 39-ish, I decided to pretty much life live head on with slim to nil considerations and opened myself to a whole new vibrant world. I made the conscious decision of choosing to luv myself, first and foremost. Don't really think I will ever be totally over the guilt factor that I still sometimes feel for doing what I had to - for taking back my life. Whatever it took to make it thru the day, the hour, the minute, the second. So, here I am, not just existing, but, actually being alive. It took a long time to get here, lots of hard work, lots of tears, lots of soul searching. Tho, I finally made it and haven't looked back, and, I don't intend do. So fortunate that I made it out alive - I am forever and a day blessed with a now beautiful and amazing life! And, there is always room for more happiness!!!

In Luv, Lite, Laffter ...
spicyfunguy 61M
205 posts
8/19/2015 4:53 am

 I would love to bring more happiness to you. I know that I could use some happiness.


trixietrixster replies on 8/21/2015 3:18 pm:
Happiness comes in so many different ways - no one size fits all. It's all a matter a perspective. Definitely open to all good stuff in my life!

Notaname99 64M  
568 posts
8/19/2015 5:02 am

 it is a tough decision. i can relate.


trixietrixster replies on 8/21/2015 3:31 pm:
Very much so - this is why I can appreciate people's positions and perspectives. It's not the same for everyone and never cut and dry. I wish for you peace, and a calm state of mind!

lomileage5 68M
Ask me for a photo
10248 posts
8/24/2015 1:03 am

 Do not feel guilt. If you have evolved in a positive direction,move forward. I have lived several distinctly separate lives,each better than the previous


trixietrixster replies on 8/24/2015 3:43 am:
Guilt is a hard emotion to deal with. Each day, I hope for the strength to let this go. Some days more so than others. I am all for bettering myself and not looking back. Crazy how I never thought I would live past my 20's, nor did I really want to. My life now is simply fucking stellar. I wake each day thankful for the day before - blessed to have another day ahead!

Bbwantsyou10 62M
73 posts
8/25/2015 5:18 pm

 I have had to deal with a lot of change in my life over the last 10 years, and a good amount of loss. Change, whether by choice or not is a difficult, world shaking thing, and I admire anyone who comes thru it with any shred of sanity, let alone a positive attitude like you. Enjoy every day, because the next one isn't a guarantee.


trixietrixster replies on 8/26/2015 4:10 am:
The only thing that is constant in change. When I walked away from my old life, I pretty much left everyone and everything I ever knew behind. Material possessions really don't mean anything to me. The only thing I really regret was having my Dads ashes kept from me - quite a mean thing to do. Oh, and having the cops called on me for standing up for myself. People can portray major amounts of vindictiveness. Bout the only thing I continued on with was my sanity. Glad you moved on to bigger and better things. This is all we can do!

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