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Polyamory for Dummies
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Polyamory for Dummies I apologize for all the errors that keep creeping into this post. I have the original document where I wrote this post and the errors do not exist in it. Yet every time I look at the post, apparent typos and misspellings have mysteriously crept in. I correct them and more appear. I can't keep up with the corrections so I'm giving up. “Fling” is a movie that first premiered in 2008 as “Lie to Me”. It’s been described as a comedy or dramedy. I don’t know what they were smoking when they wrote that. You can watch the full movie free on the same site where all the viral videos land sooner or later, but I don’t recommend it. Save your nickel. According to Collins English Dictionary, polyamory is “the practice of openly having more than one intimate relationship at a time. Wikipedia goes a bit further: “Polyamory… is the practice of or desire for intimate relationships with more than one partner, with the knowledge of all partners. (Fine, so far.) It has been described as "consensual, ethical, and responsible non-monogamy.” Collins, and the first half of the Wikipedia entry have it right, pared down to the the basics. The refinement- consensual, ethical, and responsible non-monogamy- isn’t portrayed in this movie. Samantha (Courtney Ford) and Mason (Steve Sandvoss) are a twenty-something couple who have agreed to secretly practice polyamory in an open relationship. Their friends and family don’t know- that’s the secret part. They aren’t married but are expected to, and live together, described by their friends as the perfect couple, who have it all and are ideally suited to each other. Early in the movie we’re introduced to the open aspect of the relationship when Sam leaves her sister’s wedding reception with James “Boner” Baxter (Brandon Routh) to fuck in Boner’s hotel room. Mason, who will eventually reveal himself to be a developmentally disabled twelve year old, watches with mild curiosity as Sam and James casually leave for their tryst after just as casually making out on the dance floor in full view of all the other guests, who somehow remain oblivious even while knowing Sam is in a relationship with Mason. Later these same people will be amazed to learn that Sam and Mason have an open relationship. The movie is set in Kansas City…I don’t know exactly what this tells us about the observational skills of Kanas Citians, but it ain’t flattering. Maybe this is just an enclave of self absorbed, beautiful and wealthy but dumb midwesterners. Mason is unable to score that night, but don’t feel too badly for him because he does manage to spend the evening in the hot tub with his best friend and manager’s eighteen year old sister Olivia (Shoshana Bush) although both of them know manager Luke (Nick Wechsler) would explode if confronted with this information. When Sam and Mason later meet up in their own room, there isn’t full disclosure with all the juicy details of Sam’s liaison. Sam tells Mason just enough to tease him and rejects him because he’s drunk. An astute viewer will later note that this is the fundamental basis, the very bones, of their love- Sam pushing away Mason when he’s drunk. Whoopee. Is it too much to ask that there be likable characters in a movie? I struggled to find empathy for any in this clunker. At first I thought good old Boner Baxter might be the one. On a subsequent date Sam explains to Boner that she has a boyfriend, and reveals to him that they both fuck other people. Boner lived up to his name, showed some backbone, and told her he couldn’t handle that. A lesser man might have fucked her first, then laid the sad news on her. Then, having self mockingly told her he’s too insecure to deal with sharing her and won’t…he continues seeing her and fucks her some more. Probably against his better judgment, but still, she’s a great looking piece of ass. So Boner is not likely to be the only one in the movie to know what the hell he’s trying to do. No, Boner lays on the sad news and then fucks her. Nice work if you can get it. I thought briefly that manager Luke might provide moral fibre. He’s over protective of his young sister and roundly condemns Mason’s open relationship when he learns of it. He’s narrow minded and a bit of a prig but loyal and with a sense of duty, right? And then he went and spoiled it all by beating the shit out of Mason when he discovers Mason porking the sweet Olivia on his living room sofa. Can you set a moral example while behaving like an overbearing and self righteous jackass? Self centered and hypocritical, Sam passes judgment on Mason for his childish behavior all the while enabling it and sniffing out Boner for herself. Sam insists that she loves Mason yet she rejects him time after time throughout the movie. It seems the only people this pair won’t fuck is each other. I can’t blame the actors. Juvenile fucktard that Mason is, Sandvoss played him well. He’s believable as a selfish<b> prick. </font></b>Courtney Ford is beautiful, sexy and adequate in the part if not spellbinding. She didn’t have a hell of a lot to work with. Mark Twain, in “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”, tells of the celebration where a band played an awful rendition of something vaguely resembling “In the Sweet Bye and Bye”. The King ordered them hanged for it. Hank, Twain’s hero in the book, persuaded the king to give them a second hearing. That done, Hank agreed with the sentence and watched them frog-marched away to the gallows. I found myself thinking of that story when I considered the folks who wrote “Fling”. But the plot really isn’t all that bad. In fact, reading about it, it sounds pretty interesting. It could happen, right? It’s an arousing and edgy story and deals with changes that are taking place right now with the re-definition of relationships. And, there ought to be people fucking on screen! I came very close to blaming the director for this turkey. I’m still teetering on the brink and might topple right over and shout out “J’accuse!” But I think this was a collective effort. This movie could have been and actually was nearly good. But it missed in too many little ways. You could try to make a case for brutal realism but the film doesn’t have the look or feel of that. Its characters are too frivolous and unthinking. And frankly, they are all so irritating and self possessed. One reviewer wrote in frustration “Just get over yourselves, already!” I hate giving a movie or a book a bad review. I read current fiction in addition to classics, and I read a good deal of amateur erotic fiction as well. I try to be kind. “Fling” just failed. It failed to be at all erotic, and it failed to teach us anything of value about polyamory or the difficulty of managing such a relationship. There is an attempt in the end to show that the characters have learned, grown and moved on, but this is muddied too, and unconvincing. It doesn’t ring true and doesn’t show us how. We’re simply dragged through the painful process of watching a pair of shallow poseurs destroy what might have become love had they not been too preoccupied with themselves to recognize it. Become a member now and get a free tote bag. |
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It coulda been a good one... Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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so, what you're saying is, don't bother watching??? I am confused  
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so, what you're saying is, don't bother watching??? I am confused Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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Great seeing you again. Well now I will not even watch it. Ty for your post hugs V Become a blog watcher sweet_vm
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See, this is why I hate writing a bad review. You should be free to watch it and make up your own mind. You might decide I'm full of shit. But honestly, I couldn't find anything likable about this film at all. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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Great seeing you again. Well now I will not even watch it. Ty for your post hugs V Huggggggs B Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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I do have a complaint about an issue that I've noticed from the very first post that I wrote. I've never heard another blogger mention it, but I've been plagued and irritated by it. I write in a word processor application. I have a Mac so I use TextEdit, just a simple bare bones processor. I always keep the original. I do proofread, but mistakes will still be missed. However I can check my original copy. Errors occur in my post, misspellings and apparent typos AFTER posting them. They weren't there when I posted, but happen spontaneously as the post sits there. I refer back to the original copy, and there is no error there. This has happened six times just on my last post, and I only posted it just before one this morning. Has anyone else ever noticed this? Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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I do have a complaint about an issue that I've noticed from the very first post that I wrote. I've never heard another blogger mention it, but I've been plagued and irritated by it. I write in a word processor application. I have a Mac so I use TextEdit, just a simple bare bones processor. I always keep the original. I do proofread, but mistakes will still be missed. However I can check my original copy. Errors occur in my post, misspellings and apparent typos AFTER posting them. They weren't there when I posted, but happen spontaneously as the post sits there. I refer back to the original copy, and there is no error there. This has happened six times just on my last post, and I only posted it just before one this morning. Has anyone else ever noticed this? ~~Anais Nin~~
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Thanks for the warning about the film.  ~~Anais Nin~~
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Thanks for the warning about the film. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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I have noticed weird stuff happening...typos etc when I write in MSWord and copy and paste to the blog editor here....It doesn't happen if I draft in notepad....but that doesn't check my spellings! Can't win huh. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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turkey list it is. someone should do a real movie about this. talk to real people who have coped and lived it. it may not be all sexy but i bet it would be tender and at least it would be better than crap. good to see you here. You cannot conceive the many without the one.
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turkey list it is. someone should do a real movie about this. talk to real people who have coped and lived it. it may not be all sexy but i bet it would be tender and at least it would be better than crap. good to see you here. It's good to see you too, wicked. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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