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It is hard to be the second person in anyone's life who is not family .You know going in that you are low on the priority list and have to accept it .You cannot in your mind bargain yourself up the list it does not work that way . I was the second bf to a fine lady for 5 years .The first guy was older, had money , house etc and lived as far away as I did .I first said , no I cannot date you ,you have a man I do not steal another mans woman . she told him she would not be exclusive with him ,and it was then ok for me to see her . odd weekend every year or so , he had weekend , fri sat he gave her a job to do and she needed money for the kids /house . I got mon night , we fell in love , she admitted it , but I had no money ,no house ,it all went to my ex wife .We were stuck , but did not quit for 5 years .Then something told me I would never win in the end , she needed security not true love at the time .We had an amazing relationship such as it was .I wanted more , but it was impossible with work , kids, family, etc. Then I told her I can't come anymore . I did not want to be used and have my heart broken when she went with the other guy for security ,So I fell on the sword , broke my own heart and moved on .It was agony but I survived I tried to move on ,met someone , got married but should not have now am divorcing for 2nd time ,. we have reconnected recently I just had a feeling I was supposed to she linked to me online immediately and we chatted a bit catching up she asked If I can help her and daughter ,sure I said i'll help we can meet at the time that works best for you .I have not seen either of them in 5 years .I am nervous but confident ,nothing has changed in how we feel , things are different and maybe I get a chance she lives 30 km away now not 180 ,but her life is full with job and sick mother .The kids are off on their own now though .I did not and will not ask about any bf or husband..I will find out if she still loves me as deeply My friend who talked to her says she does love me still from the feeling she gave off. , She gave me her phone number and we talked for about an hour about many things and each others family ,had laughs just like before ,so easy , so much fun .I do not want to complicate her life but I do want to complicate her life , stick myself in there so she has a choice to make . Kids and mother first ,I know that but love cannot be ignored forever . I don't think that love ever goes away for people like us ,We are cancer astrological sign and only fall totally in love once with one person ,often we don't marry that person and IT sucks .We can never fall that deeply in love again , our heart and soul belong to that one forever . She once looked at me with total love and said i'm gonna marry your ass someday .I am all for that in due time , until then I just try to be a positive in her life , not bother her , let her confide in me an let feelings build as God decides. I appreciate every message , every conversation and can't wait to see her in person , then I will know if I can be #1 not #2 finally . hang in and just appreciate what you have without wanting more ,you knew where you stood going in .
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Great read
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IMHO ... I can completely understand why your FWB asked you to not purchase anything for his daughter in a theme she currently enjoys. You seem to blur the boundary lines with him. You're his FWB not his family friend. Out of respect for his wife, he doesn't want to rub anything in her face regarding his extra-martial relationships. He is being protective & respectful of his family. I'm sure you scared the crap out of him when you dropped off goodies at his home. He may of been wondering if you planned to stop his wife or daughter on the street. If you're truly his friend and don't want to lose his friendship, step back and don't be so demanding. Show him you respect him, his family and his boundaries. You always seem to feel the need to prove something to your FWB. IE ... how smart you are ... how many people you know ... how cunning you are. WHY ? You always seem to spend hours silently spying on him, his family and friends ... WHY ? You spend hours tiring to figure out what he is thinking thru his actions or words ... WHY ? Do you have any Primal Urges ... I do, please CUMHANDLEME and explore some of my naughty and nice Primal ... Urges with me !!!
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love it
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