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HOW TO POO PROPERLY
HOW TO POO PROPERLY A Danish newspaper, MetroXpress, recently conducted a survey to see how many Danes make grunting noises while on the toilet. The survey found that nearly one in three Danes grunts when having a poo. Yes that's right, a third of all Danish poopers are grunters! It seems many people think that grunting helps them poo. But medical experts claim that grunting is bad for pooping. One Danish gastroenterologist, Jan Fallingborg, said: "... they think it helps them to push out the stools. But grunting does not help one defecate, and may even hinder the process. Basically, it is all about internal pressure, and pressure decreases when we let air and noises out of the mouth. Therefore, the release of forced sounds will have the opposite effect to what is intended, although it may feel satisfying." Gerd Johnsen, a Danish nurse with over 30 years of professional experience with constipation problems, added: "... squeals, screams, and yelling do not make people better at pushing the stool out. When you push, you should your breath, close your vocal cords, and press the diaphragm muscle downwards." So the answer to the question on how to poo properly is simple; don’t grunt! Do you regularly grunt on the toilet? Do you regularly and/or play with your phone read on the toilet? I never grunt because I don’t poo! One of my more enjoyable habits is reading a newspaper while on the toilet having a pee. I sit down to have a pee; I don’t sit down to have a poo because, as I said, I don’t poo! The Queen has her own special toilet in Nottingham City Council's Council House. Clearly she's a grunter! |
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Below is the Queen's toilet in Nottingham. [image]
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This post is hysterical. How many of you have looked at our favorite xyztube and seen the commercial Creamy Poop of a Unicorn// with the phony dude who thinks he is Johnny Depp?? { Personal Secret: I once had to take a medication that cost $2500.oo for ten pills thanks to antibiotics invasion. At that I time had no idea what poo was so I didn't poo!!}amp; (Virtual Symposium Group) use Virtual Symposium Group
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Bonjour Spunky Je vois avec plaisir que depuis le Brexit la reine à bien rajeunie, mais j'avais toujours pensée que les aristocrates n'allaient jamais chier, juste pour nous emmerder, nous la plèbe ♥ Poton ♥ Bisou ♥ Annie ♥ Hello Spunky I see with pleasure that since the Brexit the queen has rejuvenated, but I had always thought that the aristocrats were never going to shit, just to *plague , we plebs *emmerder ♥ Kiss ♥ Annie ♥
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Thanks so much I had no idea there was a proper way to poo..
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I often sit down to have a pee too! My aim isn't what it used to be. I only grunt if I'm a bit 'bunged up'
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No I don't grunt when I poo.....nor do I take the phone into the bathroom....I lived long enough without a mobile phone and I want peace in the bathroom....if it's important they will ring again!!! If they don't get an answer the second or third time they can come and see if I'm still alive!! ~~Anais Nin~~
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Ah McP, a subject very close to my fart.......... 1. Never, though I often sigh on ejection. 2. Oh yes, best place in the house for some me time.........
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Do you regularly grunt on the toilet? No, butt sometimes there is a sigh of relief. Do you regularly and/or play with your phone read on the toilet? I had also lived long enough without a cell phone and I want peace (or is it piece) in the bathroom. I never grunt, not because I don’t poo! Butt, wouldn't that mean your full of . . . . grrrrruuuunnnttt When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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Do you regularly grunt on the toilet? Regularly? Quite the play on words, Most Spunktificent One. I might occasionally grunt if it happens to be especially pleasurable, but I can't say I do it regularly.. I suppose it's as regular as I am. Do you regularly and/or play with your phone read on the toilet? Who needs a phone? I have my own toy right there at hand. I'm not a toilet reader, Spunky. Toilet time is quiet time, a time for meditation and reflection, the emptying of both one's mind and one's bowels. Buddha taught mindfulness, awareness of the moment. Be the poop, Grasshopper. Become a member now and get a free tote bag.
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I don't grunt.........I "ahhhhhhhh"!!! I do take my morning paper to the loo with me!
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Does that nurse have a specialty in defecation? .. He's pretty much right on. (Or she, but sounds like a dude's name.) .. But how does one close their vocal chords? I am in and out of there if I can be. .. I know how my body works and how the different signals get sent and read. .. I am not in the habit of reading or playing with my phone. I don't grunt, but sometimes let out a sigh of ecstasy. Like "Yeah! That's the shit!" Read my diary Journal of a Taxi Driver for taxi stories and pictures of flowers and trees.
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Do you regularly grunt on the toilet? No I don't, I'm afraid I would miss that satisfactory plop sound if I was grunting. Do you regularly and/or play with your phone read on the toilet? I only bring reading material if I was reading when I felt the urge and try to avoid using the phone for calls, as I would prefer people didn't hear the sounds that are often heard if you know what I mean Vern. I don't use the phone while making deposits. Vive La Difference
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12/4/2016 5:51 am |
I do not grunt nor do I push. I use deep breathing to eliminate. I thought to myself, why not use the deep breathing I do during yoga, while sitting on the throne. And it works, very well I might add.
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This post is hilarious! And what is really hysterical is that some people take it seriously! Visit my blog It's a Mad, Mad, Mad World of NaughtyInSO, leave a comment, become a watcher. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LIVE AND LET LIVE Be happy! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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ha ha spunky... Where you come up with these post! hugsssssss V Pleading the 5th on these questions! Become a blog watcher sweet_vm
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when my body is ready to poo, i poo.....so no i do not grunt but i do say thank you after. You cannot conceive the many without the one.
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This post is hysterical. How many of you have looked at our favorite xyztube and seen the commercial Creamy Poop of a Unicorn// with the phony dude who thinks he is Johnny Depp?? { Personal Secret: I once had to take a medication that cost $2500.oo for ten pills thanks to antibiotics invasion. At that I time had no idea what poo was so I didn't poo!!}amp;
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Bonjour Spunky Je vois avec plaisir que depuis le Brexit la reine à bien rajeunie, mais j'avais toujours pensée que les aristocrates n'allaient jamais chier, juste pour nous emmerder, nous la plèbe ♥ Poton ♥ Bisou ♥ Annie ♥ Hello Spunky I see with pleasure that since the Brexit the queen has rejuvenated, but I had always thought that the aristocrats were never going to shit, just to *plague , we plebs *emmerder ♥ Kiss ♥ Annie ♥
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Do you regularly grunt on the toilet? no I do not. When I was first married, my sister-in-law had me follow her into the house and was carrying on a conversation, including when she needed to poo, leaving me standing outside the bathroom door as she conversed and grunted away inside. I very quickly excused myself, telling her I was going outside of the house again. I will never forget that day and I've never liked or gotten along with that woman, don't worry, I have good reasons. I do tolerate her and my brother-in-law, but I really no longer have to see either of them and If I never either of them again it's fine by me. Do you regularly and/or play with your phone read on the toilet? I NEVER POO EITHER! See one more thing we have in common. Oh and how It does save on toilet roll doesn't it!
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Well unlike you who does not poo, I do not poo and I never lie about anything, unlike you do! I bet you really do too poo!
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Thanks so much I had no idea there was a proper way to poo..
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I often sit down to have a pee too! My aim isn't what it used to be. I only grunt if I'm a bit 'bunged up'
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No I don't grunt when I poo.....nor do I take the phone into the bathroom....I lived long enough without a mobile phone and I want peace in the bathroom....if it's important they will ring again!!! If they don't get an answer the second or third time they can come and see if I'm still alive!!
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Ah McP, a subject very close to my fart.......... 1. Never, though I often sigh on ejection. 2. Oh yes, best place in the house for some me time......... Wishing you a very Merry Xmas.
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