The rise of El Generico
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Posted:Apr 18, 2012 1:48 pm
Last Updated:Apr 19, 2012 5:18 pm
93428 Views
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El Generico is actually the name of a wrestler
but this isn't about him (although he is great) . And yes , I like comics AND wrestling , I have no clue how I'm single either . This is about how I'm a dirty standard member now (which sucks even more than I thought because you can't check 'where I'm quoted' I love being quoted) and I should now be referred to as El Generico , as should all standard members . Standard members don't deserve their own names . Filthy standards , I hate them so much , and now I am one of them . Anyway despite my past threats I'm probably going to keep blogging - that's all I was doing on here anyway . I am still going to pretend I'm trying to get laid somehow though . Telepathy maybe ?
"I don't want your women , I want to get well !"
Bruce Willis said that in 12 Monkeys . Which is a great movie . If you don't own it on Blu-Ray you are a bad person . I do and I don't even have a Blu-Ray player (or a Bubba Ray player) . That pretty much sums up how I feel right now . If the pope came down from space and said ;
"Hey 40 , would you rather have unlimited mind-blowing sex whenever you wanted with whomever you wanted for the rest of your life or would you rather feel better ?"
I would say say "Dude , what is your deal with contraception ? And the feel better thing ."
I took the drastic step of going to the doctor today - I had to walk in like a LOSER ! I guess they found out I was a standard member now . Anyway it turns out I'm sick - who knew ? Good thing I have shitty insurance with no prescription coverage . Apparently the super flu is going around . Tons of people at my office are out and although I'd like to take credit I am not patient zero . I did cough right in a pregnant lady's face though - through no fault of my own .
There I was , standing sexily , talking about the TPS reports when I felt a cough coming on so I turned my head politely - and she was standing right there . WHY WAS SHE SO DAMN CLOSE TO ME ?!?! I was leaning against the cube wall and she was right behind me barely one pregnant lady bellylength away . She gave me a dirty look but that's what she gets for whatever the hell she was doing . Dumb pregnant bitch . I can say that because I'm on medication . Its not me its the medication . You moron .
In other news I'm totally gay for Jack White . Not the dude himself , because he's weird looking at best , but his music . The White Stripes , the Raconteurs , Dead Weather , I love it all . His new solo album kicked my ass . I even bought the Cold Mountain soundtrack because he did a lot of the music for it . Cold Mountain people . I make fun of that movie all the time but its actually pretty decent - I like the book a lot better of course but that's how it goes .
In other other news I have an interview for a new job . I haven't been on an interview in a long time . Also I need to buy a new suit . Someone fly in an help me , I suck at shopping . Here's my best interview line ;
"I'm a people person , people like me - because I force them to with violence ."
Gah , I need to go to pass out for a while , stupid human frailties .
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Presidential historians reveal which presidents were into anal
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Posted:Apr 17, 2012 12:19 pm
Last Updated:May 3, 2012 5:57 pm
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Not really , but I think there's an opportunity the History channel is missing right there .
I think I've already talked about this but in my cold medication induced haze I'm not sure . Plus if we've learned nothing else from Steven King (and we haven't) its that writing the same thing over and over again is the mark of what people are calling genius these days .
I realized a while ago that my shampoo expired in 2006 - and I assume it takes a while for shampoo to expire so its probably 7-8 years old . My hair is rarely long enough to be able to wash . I like my hair like I like my vaginas shaved and on my head . I also like my showers like I like my women , hot and in the shower with me . Also , you know what they say - opinions are like assholes everyone has one and if they're on a lady and properly lubricated I want to insert my erect penis into them and have one or both of the partners move their hips to move the penis backward and forward inside the opinion to cause friction , typically without fully removing the penis ; often continuing until orgasm in either or both partners is achieved .
Anyway , getting back to presidential ass fuckers , I would bet that nobody was that hot on anal until lube became commonly available - which I believe was in 2007 . I mean sure bacon grease would probably do the trick but are you going to eat it afterwards ? I'm not , which is a waste . Also I found out a while ago that natural vaginal lubricant is mucus . Seems obvious now that I think about it . The sad thing is I bet if I blew my nose and rubbed it on my junk before intercourse my partner wouldn't be cool with that . Its the same thing lady , chill out - its FREE .
Also apparently there's a thing called dry sex . This involves the woman having sexual intercourse after removing vaginal lubrication in some way (I assume the new Dyson sphere) . The rationale for the practice is that a dry vagina is tighter than a lubricated vagina and supposedly increases sexual pleasure for the man .
WHAT
THE
FUCK
That just sounds like bad news for everyone involved . I am going on record right now as saying I DON'T (as in DO NOT) like having the skin rubbed off my dick . If that's your thing I'm not judging you (much) but its not for me .
In other news what are your thoughts on spoons position sexing ?
[image]
That's where I would have put a picture if I could find one . Where the heck do you find porn still pictures these days ? Its all videos all the time . Stupid high speed internet . Back in my day we jacked off to unmoving and grainy pictures that took 20 minutes to load and we LIKED it ! We LOVED it ! Anyway I've only tried it a couple times and it never worked . Probably because I've got a big fat belly and most of my lady friends had big fat asses (and I mean that in the good way) . Some day I'd like to be slim enough to do that although its probably one of those things that seems cool only because I haven't gotten to do it .
Fun fact most Roman erotic art depicted couples in the spoons position .
In other other news I almost titled this blog "I took a gay guy to prom" and then told the story about how I gave a gay friend of mine a ride to the prom but didn't go myself because I'm a dork . But that didn't sound very interesting .
My blogs have gotten a lot more disjointed lately , even before I became DEATHLY ill . I wonder what my deal .
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What the hell ?
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Posted:Apr 16, 2012 3:18 pm
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2012 2:26 pm
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I just found a pair of red and silver panties wedged under my dresser . I've never had a lady over to my new house . I'm confused and aroused . Perplexed and titillated . I better dig out my lube , and my machete .
If you broke into my house and left them there next time you break in please take out the recycling - I always forget .
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Foosball with space hookers
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Posted:Apr 16, 2012 11:52 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2012 6:34 pm
93011 Views
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I don't remember my dreams very often , though I presume I have them because its a widely believed "fact" that if you don't dream you go crazy - and not the Daffy Duck kind of crazy either , the bad Charlie Manson kind . But lately in my fever-induced delirium I've been dreaming like crazy . This morning I dreamed that myself and my band of merry space adventures rescued some genteel ladies who had been kidnapped and pressed in the sex trade against their will . While we were flying them back to their asteroid plantations I was playing foosball with one of them . Upon scoring the winning goal I was heard to remark ;
"In your face !"
Not very gracious of me , but it does bring up something I wonder about sometimes . Would it bother you if someone insulted you while (or directly after) saving your life ? If someone was scaling down the side of a burning building with you on their back and they muttered under their breath "Would it kill you to lose a few pounds ?" Would that bother you ;
1. More than usual
2. Less than usual
3. The same as usual
The general impression I get is that most people are in the 3 category - which once again (see the result from my would you sleep with an ugly guy who saved your life) seems a little ungracious to me . This person saved your life - aren't they entitled to a few liberties ? I'm not saying it doesn't make them a jerk , I'm just saying maybe they've earned the right to be a jerk .
Now , on the other hand if someone pulls you out of a tidal rip and then says "Man , if I knew you were so ugly I wouldn't have bothered saving you ." I think its okay to get upset about that .
In other news I went into work for a while today (because I hate my co-workers and want them to suffer with my illness) and when I was throwing away a rusty paperclip I thought that should be a name for some kind of disgusting sex act . It has that sound to it .
"Oh my god Cindi , what happened ?"
"I walked in on Chad giving Lurlene a rusty paperclip ! He said he loved me !"
See ? Has a nice ring to it . So anyway , what pervert sex act should this name be for ? I also have the spelunking astronaut in my back pocket if there's another obscene sex act you've come up with that needs a name .
In other other news I accidentally kidnapped one of my neighbors cats . You see when I'm sick I usually don't take any medicine (because I'm an idiot) but I felt so shitty Saturday I bought some Nyquil and slammed that down like a jello shot off an STD infested co-ed . So I was pretty out of it . I remember being pissed because my cat was outside and it was raining and going out any getting him . The next morning I thought to myself - my cat doesn't have a collar , also there was only one of him last time I checked . I have to say the kidnappee was pretty nonplussed about the whole thing . My cat would flip out and claw the shit out of everything in sight if someone grabbed him .
Speaking of which , one of my childhood friends is a priest and even though I'm not Catholic I ask his advise about religiosity sometimes . Many years ago when I first got my cat he was outside and some started throwing sticks at him and chasing him around and I quite literally lost my fucking mind . I never believed until that moment when people talked about "losing control" and committing crimes . I chased after them and honestly I'm sure if I had caught any of them I would have beat the everliving shit out of them - I could not control myself . Anyway , I asked priesto about it because it really shook me up that I could lose it like that . Here's how that went ;
"You couldn't catch up to them because God was looking out for you - he didn't want you to hurt them ."
"No , I couldn't catch up with them because I'm a fat clumsy idiot and I fell on my ass ."
"Its all part of God's plan ."
I call bullshit on that . Also this dude doesn't believe the Bible is fact , throws down Yagerbombs like potato chips and has a secret girlfriend . So maybe his advise isn't all its cracked up to be .
In summation , if the domain name foosballwithspacehookers isn't already taken its about to be .
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Check out the empowerment on that !
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Posted:Apr 15, 2012 8:30 am
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2012 11:53 am
92638 Views
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Female superhero costumes are the comic industry's "No Cooties" signs : They prove that the people who designed them think about girls (a lot) but don't really know how they work and are making sure it stays that way . The only "strong" in many "strong female comic book characters" are the oblique muscles required to point their ass and boobs in the same direction .
Power Girl is one of my favorite characters (even though her super name is super lame) but come on ? Boob window ? Charged with making a female Superman , Power Girl's costume designer's only thoughts were "breasts" and "done." They'd already given Supergirl a miniskirt (and as a consequence, the entire population of Metropolis got a panty shot). With Power Girl , they upped the ante and opened a tit-window . Most spandex heroes have a symbol on their chest summarizing their character , and so does Power Girl: an empty hole full of cleavage .
There is no counterargument . Fans and writers have tried to explain Power Girl's breast-viewing port several times , and each theory is more ridiculously unsupported than the breasts they're attempting to justify . The most common (and ridiculous) explanation is "I am strong and empowered and therefore love being naked and stared at ." You know , the same reason Superman flies around in a thong . One writer claims it's to show that she's healthy , so we can only be grateful that Krypton never discovered gynecology . Another is the idea of distracting villains , because when you mainly fight robots and aliens and can punch through a tank , your best weapon is clearly nudity .
DC has made it very clear that they consider the rest of Power Girl a superpowered breast-delivery service (Faster than a speeding bullet ! Bigger than a human head !) They once changed her entire back story from solar superpowered alien to magical Atlantean and back again , and the only thing that stayed constant was the hole in the costume .
Now , I will admit that if I had superpowers I would never wear clothes again , but that's me . Back when I had a comic shop a friend and I had this argument all the time . His position was people want want that want and there's no harm in giving it to them . Disagree . People want a lot a things that are bad for both themselves and society . I realize that being concerned about the depiction of women in comics is pretty silly in the grand scheme of things but it bothers me , what can I say ?
And now the punchline ;
On day Superman is flying around Metroplis and he sees Wonder Woman laying out naked on the roof of a building . He circles around a couple times and thinks to himself "Man , I got to get me some of that Wonder pussy" . So he uses his superspeed , flies down and fucks her , and is gone again in a split second . Wonder Woman says "What was that ?" and the Invisible Woman says "I don't know but the back of my head is all sticky ."
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40Deuce vs Agent J ; Begun this blog war has
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Posted:Apr 14, 2012 7:41 am
Last Updated:Apr 17, 2012 5:51 pm
93619 Views
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I've been shopping around for someone to have a blog war with for a while now . It had to be dude of course because I would have no chance against a lady and her power to post nude photos and I want to lose a fair fight . So after a lot of careful deliberation I've decided to declare blog war on this dude
whoisagentj
You have to give it up to the guy his blog has a very appealing look and theme . And his writing is decent - not great , but good enough for for a blog on a sex site . Just to make this clear , I don't know Agent J , he's probably a nice guy , but my goal in life is now to destroy him utterly .
I 40Deuce , Grand Marshal and Dictator for life (and a couple years after) of the United Forts of The Showroom of Compassion do hereby and henceforth and forthwit declare that a state of war exists between the nations of the United Forts of The Showroom of Compassion and The Dossier of Agent J . I will stipulate that the word dossier is awesome but nevertheless and consequently , the Showroom of Compassion discontinues diplomatic relations with said dossier and declares that under these circumstances brought about by a whim too , as from today , considers herself as being in a state of war with said dossier .
I call upon all my fellow mid-western blogger brethren to join me in what I hope will be a long , bloody , and pointless conflict that will make boys into men , orphans into widows , Boyz II Men , and creepy twins into horrific mutants with 4 arms and 2 heads .
The best part is there's no real chance he reads this blog so he probably won't even know - that's my kind of war , talking bad about someone behind their back .
Agent J , consider this this the first salvo ;
I mock your values unless they coincide with my values in which case you are a copycat .
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I need some sexual healing (or at least some Flintstones chewable morphine)
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Posted:Apr 14, 2012 7:16 am
Last Updated:Apr 16, 2012 10:35 am
92345 Views
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When we had our shop my buddy used to play that song all the time . So there's a whole generation of out there who came in to buy pokemon cards that know the words to a Marvin Gaye song by heart . Also anyone who thinks that don't have any attention span these days has never seen looking through stacks of cards for a collectible card game .
Since I live alone and generally avoid all human contact I rarely get sick but last night I went down for the count all of a sudden . At 6 I felt fine . By 7 I was ejecting mucus from every port . I guess at least I didn't have the 2-3 days of feeling like you're going to get sick first which is sometimes even worse . Point is I feel like crap and I want sympathy . NOW .
Also I made a girl cry yesterday and not in the usual way - by dating them and then them realizing that they're dating me . My boss is pretty clever in one way - most bosses if they were trying to get rid of someone would try to bury them with work - but I have to give my dude credit , he knows me better than I thought . There's nothing I hate more than not having anything to do at work so he's been slowly moving all my duties to other people (who can't do them but that's another story) at this point all I have left is auditing/quality control . So that's what I was doing . I explained to said girl , who's job it is to get documentation for claims , that if she can't get the documentation she needs to let someone know - she can't just move on to the next claim . We can't send out claims without documentation . That's more or less verbatim what I said - seemed pretty normal workplace talk to me .
Must have been worse than I thought though because she started bawling . I don't know what its like to be a woman . I haven't been one in a long time . So I know that I shouldn't judge , but I'm going to . It infuriates me when women cry at work . I don't know why it makes me so angry but it does . This is WORK can't you have a little composure ? This time though I didn't get mad at all , I didn't really feel anything - so I guess my journey to sociopath is complete . She's young and pretty so that was probably the first time in her life she got some negative feedback . I can't blame her I guess . I remember when I was in kindergarten and I got told I did something wrong for the first time .
Anyway , so now everyone at work thinks I'm a huge asshole . In other work related news the new thing my boss has come up with to waste my time is sending me to a high school to give a speech about financial responsibility . I wonder , which is more useless to teenagers - a speech about abstinence or a speech about financial responsibility . Could be a toss up . The funny thing is he's sending the lady he was harassing that started this whole fiasco in the first place with me . Maybe the whole thing is a set up and he's going to have us rubbed out .
In other other news I posted a comment on a blog the other day that the blog owner didn't care for . This happens a lot - most people don't appreciate my brand of "humor" . Usually they just delete my comment , but this person decided to go the mocking route instead . Which honestly I'm fine with - people can do whatever they want with their blogs - when I post something I know that going in . But I got an e-mail from an older Canadian gentlemen who suggested that I report her for abuse because "I don't have to that" . I appreciate the thought , but I disagree . This is the internet folks - this is where people come to be dicks .
In real life you have to reign in your dickishness to some degree because eventually someone is going to suplex your ass if you don't . But here , sitting behind our keyboards - there is no restraint . You can let your full dickishness run wild and free on the plains of rudeness and bad behavior . I wouldn't be posting stuff on here if I wasn't okay with the prospect of being ridiculed . Is it a nice thing to do ? Of course not . But there's no room for niceness on the internet . You have to have a thick skin right ? And that is what freedom of speech is all about . I may not like being called a fat loser but I will defend to the death the right for people to say such things . And then cry myself to sleep at night (just not at work) .
This wasn't a very good post but I'm sick - cut me some slack .
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Oh no , a dude hotlisted me ! Run ! (aka 95 cents for a proper fucking)
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Posted:Apr 12, 2012 4:39 pm
Last Updated:Feb 12, 2013 3:12 pm
92972 Views
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Gay guys used to send me messages all the time when I first joined . It never made sense to me because I'm an unsophisticated fat slob who dresses like crap but now that I'm older and wiser I realize that I was being prejudice . Thinking all gay guys are in good shape , dress well , buy nice shoes , and are witty and urbane is wrong . I know it doesn't seem wrong (mostly because its true) but stereotypes are bad even if they're positive . Like thinking Irish people can fly or Guatemalans can turn potatoes into candy . Even if its true you can't think it - because that's prejudice . Also for the record I am nominally in favor of gay marriage but I would much rather just make it illegal for anyone to get married ever . That seems more fair .
I don't usually eat lunch but I was stressed today and that always makes me hungry (as does everything else) so I went to Quiznos . My total was 6.95 and I gave the lady behind the counter a 10 . She took 95 cents out of the leave a penny tub and gave me 4 bucks back . There are any number of reasons she might have done this . Maybe the register is out of change . Maybe she's lazy and the tub was closer . Maybe she was bored and that's how you have fun when you work a Quiznos . There's any number of reasons (including the inexplicable) she might have done that . But I'm sure I hit on the right reason . She wants me . Bad . Ninty-five cents bad .
Nothing else makes sense . The take a penny leave a penny tub is a sacred covenant that I don't think I'm going to far to say is the cornerstone of our society . Its altruism as its most pure form . Its what makes us human . And why , why I ask you , would this not unattractive female human violate this trust unless she was so overwhelmed by the full force of my 40Deuceyness that that lost her mind for a moment ? Madness as you know is like gravity - all it takes is a little push . And that's not all ! While I was shoving my cheesesteak in my gullet like a starving hippo she came over to me and said , boobily "Is this your jacket ?"
Ah yeah , I know what you're trying to say girl . You're trying to say "its all on , its business time ." I mean I was wearing my jacket right - did she think I was some kind of wealthy MILLIONAIRE with two jackets ? Its all adding up to 40Deuce being ball deep in this saucy Quiznos wench .
"No" I said handsomely
"Oh , someone must have left it here" she said lustily and walked off .
And so the timeless dance of seduction begins .
In other news I have my bi-yearly formal/informal chat/interrogation with not my boss (who regular readers of my blog know I'm getting on with) not my bosses boss (who really thorough readers of my blog know I don't care for) but with my bosses bosses boss (who scarily obsessive readers of my blog know doesn't like me) coming up next week . I don't believe in the idea of a bucket list , but one time in my life I would like to tell the truth at one of these things . Not because it would change anything if someone in authority know how ridiculous everything was , but just because it would make me feel better . I always feel like a scumbag after I lie my way through these things . I know its the "smart" thing to do if I want to have "money" and not "die homeless in the gutter" but I don't like it .
On other other news I got my Red Lantern shirt in the mail today . Which is pretty cool .
And now for 40Deuce trivia - What was the original name of my blog ? Answer correctly and get a 1987 DG 20 Casio Electric Guitar (Mandolin setting no longer works)
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Annoyed
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Posted:Apr 11, 2012 5:55 pm
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2012 2:27 pm
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As it does randomly this here website won't let me see any blogs past the first page . Usually if I refresh enough times and jump around and invoke Ogun it eventually lets me - not tonight though . Anyone write anything good ? Summarize all the blog posts in the last 24 hours for me . Also I deputize you all to comment on blogs on my behalf until I get to see them again . I mean why would someone want to post a blog unless for me to comment on it ?
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Adrian Brody - monster humper
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Posted:Apr 10, 2012 5:40 pm
Last Updated:Apr 12, 2012 4:07 pm
93343 Views
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When I got home from my grandma's Easter day I was tried from driving and chasing my nieces around so I just flopped down in front of the TV and flipped around for a while . I saw most of Splice , which is an okay movie . For the most part its the old create a hideous monster "oh shit we created a hideous monster" story , but towards the end things get weird . This is the monster ;
I haven't had sex in nearly 3 years and I wouldn't go near that thing with a ten foot clown pole . That would be the difference between 40Deuce and Adrian Brody . Oscar Winner Adrian Brody was all up in that monster snatch . What makes it even more disturbing is he and chick from Dawn of the Dead were raising this thing as their . So not just monster humping , but weird kind of y monster humping . But that's not all , a little while later the monster jumps on the chick from Dawn of the Dead and lays the hammer on her vag too . You see the monster not only has a vagina but also has retractable penis as well . Which I think we can all agree is a pretty good idea . You want to use your penis , bam , pop it out - otherwise you can just vagina it up . Anyway when the movie was over I thought to myself "That was a little too much monster humping for Easter"
This morning when I was looking through my underwear drawer for my red boxer briefs (because its a widely believed fact that you're 11% more likely to get laid with red underwear) I found that I still had a pair of plain old briefs rattling around the bottom . Why did I keep those ? I'm way too fat to be wearing briefs and there's no realistic chance I'm going to ever slim down enough - unless my idea to harness flesh eating bacteria for good gets some traction with the government . Just for fun I popped the bad boys on just to remind myself how much ball crushing action there is - I have to admit it does present your junk in a nice fashion .
In other news a lady I work with claims she got swimmer's ear from her husband (accidentally) shooting his load in her ear . Seems plausible but I'm not sure - is there bacteria in semen ? Anyway , just to safe I would suggest wearing earmuffs next time you go down a guy . I recommend goggles too , but that's never caught on .
When I was a my friends used to play a game (and I use the term loosely) where when driving they would point their finger at someone and shout "BANG" and if they looked that meant you "killed" them . Like most thing teenage boys do it was seriously stupid . I rarely indulged in this , but there was one time when I was driving home in the wee hours of the morning . My parent's house was a couple of blocks away from a church and in the church parking lot (well on a blanket in the grass next to the parking lot) were a couple of my fellow teens going at it hardcore . So of course I rolled down my window , pointed , and
BANG
Needless to say I "killed" the shit out of them . The chick just sat there stunned but the dude jumped , hauled (bare) ass , jumped a fence and ran off into the night . I laughed so hard I almost drove into a lightpole .
I've fooled around in the shower but I've never had shower sex . I bet its not that great unless its warm out - I imagine a lot of shivering going on . When I went to Hawaii the place we stayed had a shower that was probably a good eight feet square , had 3 shower heads , and a bench in the middle . Is there any reason for that to exist OTHER than shower sex ? How to bring that up with the contractor ? I did date a lady with a pool and I will say pool sex is pretty sweet .
Update on the amazing story of my sister's couch . As I'm sure you ALL read I tried to give it away to one of my co-workers but they were being difficult so I bailed on that idea . No one else wanted it so I put it out for the spring clean-up yesterday . Today my sister calls me and says she wants to sell it at my parents garage sale and when I tell her its gone she gets all pissy with me . Lets travel back in time to when I was helping her bring in her new couch .
40Deuce - What are we going to do with the old one ?
Sister - Toss it in the dumpster .
40Deuce - One of my friends might want it , I'll put it in the back room at my house and if no one takes it I'll put it out for the spring clean-up .
AND THAT'S WHAT I DID .
Anyway , what's enough random nonsense for one day .
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You part the waters I'm drowning in
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Posted:Apr 9, 2012 5:58 pm
Last Updated:Apr 11, 2012 5:32 pm
92201 Views
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I put that on the card with flowers I sent to a lady once . I never know if women like that sappy stuff or if they roll their eyes and toss the card in the trash as soon as they see it . I don't remember who or where but there was a blog post around these parts about how a blowjob is like flowers to a man . I disagree with that , I guess a blowjob at work might be fun but I don't want everyone to see it so they're made to be jealous .
I was reminded Saturday what a huge nerd I am . I was hanging out with a couple of my oldest friends who I don't get to see much anyone . And what did we do ? We played Axis and Allies for 9 hours - it was off the hook ! The game was abandoned at 1 AM since we all had Easter commitments and it wasn't even close to being over . Then I couldn't sleep because I was thinking about what I would have done if the game continued . Then I woke up early so I could sneak in a game online before I went to my grandma's . And that's not even in my top ten games . I need to go to Comic-Con again to be reminded that I'm a nerd but there are WAY nerdier nerds than I .
I caved in and got HBO so I could watch the second season of Game of Thrones . They killed Ned people . The dirty Lannisters have to pay . I started reading the first book too now that I've seen the first season . The following is a passage where he is writing from the point of view of a woman - always a tough thing for a dude to do . The albino chick is on her way to a key confrontation , and the narrator describes it thusly ;
"When she went to the stables , she wore faded sandsilk pants and woven grass sandals . Her small breasts moved freely beneath a painted Dothraki vest ..."
That's written from the woman's point of view . Yes , when a male writes a female , he assumes that she spends every moment thinking about the size of her breasts and what they are doing . "Janet walked her boobs across the city square . 'I can see them staring at my boobs ,' she thought , boobily." And its been said that MY writing lacks subtlety . Or at least it was back when I did a lot of writing .
That's pretty much all I got today - except that I wish someone (preferably a lady) would come and lovingly caress my balls tonight . Feels like a ball caressing kind of night . I like ball action but whenever a lady puts my balls in her mouth I get way too much tooth action on the sides . The only advice I have for the cock manipulators out there is don't forget about the balls . Because as Dave Atell says the balls are the bouncers for the penis .
"Sorry fingers , we're at capacity tonight . BUT , I know another club around the corner . . . ."
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Deflecting blame to society ? You know it !
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Posted:Apr 7, 2012 3:41 pm
Last Updated:May 11, 2012 8:50 pm
93527 Views
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Does it seem like men feel kind of entitled to sex? Does it seem like we react to rejection with the maturity of a being denied a toy?
Well, you have to keep in mind that what we learn as is really hard to deprogram as an adult. And what we learned as is that we males are each owed, and will eventually be awarded, a beautiful woman.
We were told this by every movie, TV show, novel, comic book, video game and song we encountered. When the Karate wins the tournament, his prize is a trophy and Elisabeth Shue. Neo saves the world and is awarded Trinity. Marty McFly gets his dream girl, John McClane gets his ex-wife back, Keanu "Speed" Reeves gets Sandra Bullock, Shia LaBeouf gets Megan Fox in Transformers, Iron Man gets Pepper Potts, the hero in Avatar gets the hottest Na'vi, Shrek gets Fiona, Bill Murray gets Sigourney Weaver in Ghostbusters, Frodo gets Sam, WALL-E gets EVE ... and so on.
Hell, at the end of An Officer and a Gentleman, Richard Gere walks into the lady's workplace and just carries her out like he's picking up a suit at the dry cleaner.
And then we have Star Wars, where Luke starts out getting Princess Leia (in The Empire Strikes Back), but then as Han Solo became a fan favorite, George Lucas realized he had to award her to him instead (forcing him to write the "She's secretly Luke's sister" thing into Return of the Jedi, even though it meant adding the weird vibe to Empire). With Harry Potter, J.K. Rowling played with the convention by having the beautiful girl get awarded to the sidekick character Ron, but she made it a central conflict in the story that Ron is constantly worried that, since Harry is the main character, Hermione will be awarded to him instead.
In each case, the woman has no say in this -- compatibility doesn't matter, prior relationships don't matter, nothing else factors in. If the hero accomplishes his goals, he is awarded his favorite female. Yes, there will be dialogue that maybe makes it sound like the woman is having doubts, and she will make noises like she is making the decision on her own. But we, as the audience, know that in the end the hero will "get the girl," just as we know that at the end of the month we're going to "get our paycheck." Failure to award either is breaking a societal contract. The girl can say what she wants, but we all know that at the end, she will wind up with the hero, whether she knows it or not.
And now you see the problem. From birth we're taught that we're owed a beautiful girl. We all think of ourselves as the hero of our own story, and we all (whether we admit it or not) think we're heroes for just getting through our day.
So it's very frustrating, and I mean frustrating to the point of violence, when we don't get what we're owed. A contract has been broken. These women, by exercising their own choices, are denying it to us. It's why every Nice Guy is shocked to find that buying gifts for a girl and doing her favors won't win him sex. It's why we go to "slut" and "" as our default insults -- we're not mad that women enjoy sex. We're mad that women are distributing to other people the sex that they owed us.
Yes, the women in these stories are being portrayed as wonderful and beautiful and perfect. But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.
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Kim Kardashian made a sex tape ?
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Posted:Apr 7, 2012 8:00 am
Last Updated:Apr 11, 2012 5:31 pm
92390 Views
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I thought she was famous for no reason - looks like the Paris Hilton model of success does work . Anyone seen it ? Worth the trouble ?
Also I keep hearing about blog wars going on - why do I keep missing out on these ? The only reason I started blogging was so I could get involved in a blog war .
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