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| Blogs > whitewhife4black > Vanilla Lady Loves Chocolate |
Open Marriage
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Open Marriage Now that is a term that occasionally pops up but its origins date back to the seventies. In a nutshell, an open mariage is one where either participant is allowed to experience and spend time with people other than their spouse. One example of an open marriage relationship we here about far too often is the "Don't ask, Don't tell' variety where typically the man will tell Carol that he has an 'agreement' with his wife because his sex drive is more than his wife wants or can handle and that she has told him to 'do his thing but I don't want to know'. Frankly, we're more apt to assume the guy is totally bull-shiting us about his situation and he is only doing it to get the woman to accept him being married while at the same time, keeping it a 'secret'. Of cource, the main problem with a married man is that the relationship (at least one with Carol) must obviously be so one sided. He is unable to make firm commitments about when to meet, he is afriad to be seen in public for fear his wife or one of their family friends will spot him out with another woman. If he calls and happens to get voice mail on Carol's phone, he probably even has the phone hidden from his wife so he is never able to talk. Not to mention the obvious danger he places Carol in! The last thing she wants is an irate wife banging on the front door carrying her shotgun. If a man is upfront and lets Carol know that she doesn't know and can never find out... she is much more likely to agree to a meet with him because she knows that it has to be really descrete. Plus, she has absolutely no allusions about a meet and is 100% aware that it is 100%<b> booty call. </font></b>We've talked about this an although Carol really isn't looking for just the booty side of it, there is a part of her that feels that if a man is going to cheat... it needs to be with a person such as herself who won't be pushing the man to leave his wife. In fact, although I sure a cheated on wife would typically not view Carol screwing her husband as a kindness... it may in fact actually improve her relationship with her husband because he has an outlet for his biologically driven urges that has limited 'risk' with regards his permenent situation. Our "open marriage" is pretty much the ULTIMATE in "open marriage". You will often see the phrase "no strings attached" as part of a man's profile but lets face it... strings get attached. Sex and just spending time together starts weaving 'strings' from the first 'hello' issued between two people. It took years to make this happen. But, we reached a point where Carol might say that someone was the best fuck of her life or she might even have extended, multiple dates with a guy and maybe even develop real affections with someone and it is all 100% cool and ok... because we learned who we are and developed what we can handle over years of trial and error. I think we got it right! |
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Wow. Thanks for that insight and I truly feel where you are coming from. My wife and I have something similar in that I am free to go and spend time with others and she is aware of who and what I do. Our only stipulation is that at this point, she is not agreeable to my having intercourse with another, so I abide by this (it forces me into being VERY creative and sensual). We are working towards our "Ultimate open marriage". We were discussing dinner with you guys and I hope to meet with you both for that... and maybe more with Carol as well. Congratulations and much continued success.
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