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Confession
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Confession I am an introvert. There, I said it. Many people who know me well and have followed my blog might think otherwise. The Urban Dictionary defines an introvert as: "A person who is energized by spending time alone. Often found in their homes, libraries, quiet parks that not many people know about, or other secluded places, introverts like to think and be alone." Contrary to popular belief, not all introverts are shy. Some may have great social lives and love talking to their friends but just need some time to be alone to "recharge" afterwards. The word "Introvert" has negative connotations that need to be destroyed. Introverts are often misunderstood because the majority of the population consists of extroverts. Here are the hallmarks of an introvert: 1. You find small talk incredibly cumbersome. Yes, I do. As a therapist, I prefer deep meaningful conversation. 2. You go to parties -– but not to meet people. At a party, most introverts would rather spend time with people they already know and feel comfortable around. 3. You often feel alone in a crowd. If you ever feel like an outsider in the middle of social gatherings and group activities, even with people you know you might be an introvert. 4. You've been called "too intense." Do you have a penchant for philosophical conversations and a love of thought-provoking books and movies? If so, you're a textbook introvert. Introverts like to jump into the deep end. 5. Downtime doesn’t feel unproductive to you. One of the most fundamental characteristics of introverts is that they need time alone to recharge their batteries. Whereas an extrovert might get bored or antsy spending a day at home alone with coffee and a stack of magazines, this sort of down time feels necessary and satisfying to an introvert. Lately, I've come to realize that after social engagements and partner-focused weekends that I often need downtime during the week to recharge. My partner is having difficulty understanding my need to have this downtime. Are you an introvert? Has being an introvert hindered your ability to have a healthy and satisfying relationship? How do you integrate balance in your relationship with your partner to help them understand your needs without them taking it as a personal affront?  |
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*uck girl.... You nailed it  Really, I've never seen it put clearer.....Just, you almost make it sound like a problem... Mark xxx
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11/21/2014 7:57 am |
Neat photo! I used to take offense when folks called me introverted. Conjuring those negative connotations as you mention - like a label or a diagnosis. Wish I had good ideas about how to work it out with your man. Perhaps on your end, realize that he likely just wants to be with you -- even if it is simply curled up on the couch nearby while you "recharge" in the ways you require. Good luck!
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I'll confess... I'm an introvert as well. Those five hallmarks above describe me to a tee. Let me tell you if I don't get my downtime I am downright grumpy and bitchy! Just ask the GF... she knows to give me some down time or she will pay the price later. She jokes that if I don't sleep in until 10:00 at least one day over the weekend I need to take a day off during the week. It's true!  Many people don't think that perverts can be introverts as well! You can visit my blog here FreddiesFling!
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me too sugar! All female and born this way ~!
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I'm as introverted as they come, and often feel misunderstood. Thoughts from the Garden...
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This pretty well fits me, with the exception of #2. I try my best to NOT go to parties. I'm much too uncomfortable and don't enjoy it. Yes, I struggle with the small talk and growing up I was often called stuck up because of the inability to engage in small talk with someone I didn't know well (or at all). Not having down time or alone time can have some horrible consequences, as I found out when my ex and I tried being team drivers and were together 24/7. I would spend a lot of time not talking and he would spend a lot of time being angry because I didn't have anything to say. Even knowing I'm an introvert, he didn't understand. Pagan  Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!
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I'm not sure what to make of this. While I'm certainly not "energized" by spending time alone, all of the hallmarks with the exception of #4, can definitely be attributed to me. Maybe I'm just lazy, lol.
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I have often referred to myself as “the mirror”, meaning I reflect the personality of those around me. I'm quite capable of being wild and crazy, with wild and crazy folks, but can also hold my own with the more intense and internally focused types. But yeah, both do eventually wear me out and I need my alone time, so, by your definitions are am an introvert. Sexting with the Boys I Know What the Ladies Want to See, at Least on THIS Particular HNW Busted [post 3312759] My Private Blog – Tell me All your Secrets
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Oh I'm a total introvert. I love me some downtime after being around people.  But you probably already knew that. 
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Great post! I am a little of both... results from all of the personality inventories I have taken peg me as a little introvert or a little extrovert... I have taken some inventories multiple times with opposite results... Yes, I comfortably fit most of the introvert traits you describe... then, I can get most people smiling and laughing in 20 seconds... but those 20 seconds take a lot of energy from me... So, I guess I am just a chameleon who totally understands your need to recharge your batteries with some downtime...
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I'm totally an introvert which surprises many because I'm so outgoing. Agree with whomever said alone time is NOT sitting on a couch next to someone, no matter how quiet they are. I've had my struggles with this lately but hopefully by speaking up, he has a better understanding and getting space won't be such an issue. My daughter is an extrovert and it took us a long time to figure out how to make that work between us. Hopefully, your guy will get it too...the way I always present it is as a good thing for them...alone time for me equals MUCH better together time, even if it's a little less total time. Reduced alone time just means he gets to be in hell more often when we are together! Always tell the truth Use kind words Keep your promises Giggle and laugh Be positive Love one another Always be grateful Forgiveness is mandatory Try new things Say please and thank you Say your prayers Smile ~Author unknown
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