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| Blogs > 40Deuce > Sherry Stringfield's ass in 93 |
Ye Olde 40Deuce
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Ye Olde 40Deuce Back in the day I used to have a "funny" profile that people seemed to like - I repost it here (in part) for your "enjoyment" To truly know a person you have to render them down to 14 salient points - which I have done below for your convenience . Each one is more true than the last . 1 I once made love for 83 hours straight – to a couch cushion – only stopping once to put on a different belt 2 I am one of the 12 richest kings of England 3 I have had a vasectomy , and had it reversed – ten times (to date) 4 Due to my unique heritage – which includes Egyptian Necromancers , Native American shamans , the Roman goddess Venus , and alien hybrids – I am able to see in the dark and detect ghosts 5 While I do not possess the ability to dodge bullets I DO have the power to get hit by them and be badly injured – possibly even dying as a result 6 When I speak the magical word “Shazam” I gain all the powers of 80’s supergroup Foreigner 7 I have taught a group of cats (and 1 mongoose) to perform the Riverdance 8 I invented the Cobb salad AND the Caesar salad (although I had help on the first one) 9 One time I got knocked down , but I got up again – they wrote a song about it , that sucked 10 I am personally responsible for the destruction of over 17 dozens species of native birds , mammals , and seashells in Nebraska wetlands 11 On more than one occasion I have headbutted a moose so hard that it was knocked unconscious and molested by rodeo clowns – one time the President called me about it 12 I have been told that if I didn’t return my videos to the store a motorcycle gang would beat the crap out of me – and I believe it ; I was also told that I should wear dress pants to school on picture day or I’d get uppercutted , I didn’t believe that but I should have 13 I founded America WAY before any Pilgrims or syphilis-infected Spaniards but I was talking really quietly when I did it so no one noticed 14 If you were going to be hit by a meteor I would TOTALLY push you out of the way so you could continue living in something close to your normal fashion – and if it happened again I’d do it again ; and possibly I’d do it a third time , but that would be it Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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The funny thing is that was my profile during the time period when I had luck on here , absurdism gets you a lot more action than I ever would have thought I know you haven't seen his chest but did the new Spock do anything for you ? Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.
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